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Have you ever felt that you are surrounded by the wrong people who do not inspire you to new achievements, do not support you in moments of weakness? And have you thought about how you yourself are a friend, do you inspire others, do you make them happier? Let's discuss this very interesting and multifaceted topic.
As we grow older, each of us notices that in any friendship there are different stages, and also that each of your friends can be conditionally classified into different categories. Interestingly, when you clearly realize this, you will stop feeling guilt, as well as resentment towards people close to you. You will be easier to relate to your own and other people's shortcomings, because each group of friends has its own special qualities and demeanor.
Very often we sadly realize that the friendship is over, but we continue to maintain such a relationship out of habit. They bring no joy to either side. The reason is that both of you have changed and you no longer have common topics of conversation, you are too different and speak different languages. More and more often there are situations when you feel uncomfortable with them, because they measure you by the old standards, and you have changed a lot.
It's time to say goodbye to people whose friendship has lost all meaning. Remember that during your communication you have made new acquaintances, and the amount of time in the day has remained unchanged. Every year there are more acquaintances, and it is simply impossible to pay attention to everyone. From this comes resentment and strife. Therefore, it is very difficult to end such a friendship, but it is necessary. Realize that this is normal and even correct. In the end, your old friend feels the same way, knowingly or not. Agree, it is better to stop communicating with such a person than to maintain a strange friendship, in which there is no point, and meetings turn into a showdown and constant quarrels. Many of us end relationships with other people for the same reason, but when it comes to friendship, people here somehow feel guilty.
Of course, not every old friend is bad. We all know examples (or maybe we are direct participants) when people communicate and be friends for decades and it brings them pleasure. This means that they became friends not because they went to the same class, but precisely because they are interested in each other. We are talking about friends who have become such by coincidence of time and place circumstances and will not bring anything good in the future.
The first group is friends with whom you do not mind maintaining a relationship, but they remain purely entertaining. With such a friend, you never talk about serious or personal topics, you just spend time with the company, go to the sea or walk around the city from time to time. By all accounts, they are your friends (you spend enough time with them for this), however, you keep them at a distance, this friendship is purely external.
The second group is people whom you have known for ten years, but at the same time see each other once or twice a year. You have a different life with such a person, you do not interfere with each other and only meet when both want it as much as possible. This state of affairs suits both parties and it makes sense not to change anything.
Curiously, easy friends never take offense at you if you cannot devote time to them, because it is quite difficult to call you real friends. With such a person, you can plan a meeting in six months and it will be absolutely normal for both.
With such people, you feel comfortable and can spend the day and night. On them you want and can spend most of your free time and energy.
Friends for growth are just interesting to you. These are not forced acquaintances at work, these are the people whom you have chosen. You trust such friends. It means that you are sometimes even more frank with them than in front of yourself.
You respect such friends and it is mutual. It is important for you what they say and how they relate to what you said. You can be different, but you appreciate these differences and they do not become a reason for conflict.
Of course, there are not so many such people in the life of every person. At least because of the workload, the presence of a family and work. If you think you have ten friends to grow, then you are most likely wrong. And if you think about it, you will understand that there are, for example, three of them, and the remaining seven belong to the other two categories.
Despite the fact that there are not very many such people in your life, it always makes sense to make new acquaintances and get to know new people. Any person is developed and shaped by people and books. The more inspiring people and books are around you, the better you are as a person. Writer Jim Rohn said: "You are the psychological average of the five people you most often associate with." The smarter, smarter, more creative, and kinder people you are friends with, the better you become. This is inevitable, because we take people's habits, ways of thinking and behavior. You probably noticed how you started repeating some words and phrases of the person with whom you began to communicate. The same thing happens with our thoughts.
Therefore, pay attention to whether there are friends in your environment for growth and if not, meet people, communicate with them and take the best from them. This is normal and correct, and there is nothing reprehensible in it.
As we grow older, each of us notices that in any friendship there are different stages, and also that each of your friends can be conditionally classified into different categories. Interestingly, when you clearly realize this, you will stop feeling guilt, as well as resentment towards people close to you. You will be easier to relate to your own and other people's shortcomings, because each group of friends has its own special qualities and demeanor.
Old friends
These are friends whom you know from school, university, work or acquaintance happened somehow differently. The main aspect here is a long acquaintance with a specific person. You have a shared past, a sea of emotions, quarrels and events.Very often we sadly realize that the friendship is over, but we continue to maintain such a relationship out of habit. They bring no joy to either side. The reason is that both of you have changed and you no longer have common topics of conversation, you are too different and speak different languages. More and more often there are situations when you feel uncomfortable with them, because they measure you by the old standards, and you have changed a lot.
It's time to say goodbye to people whose friendship has lost all meaning. Remember that during your communication you have made new acquaintances, and the amount of time in the day has remained unchanged. Every year there are more acquaintances, and it is simply impossible to pay attention to everyone. From this comes resentment and strife. Therefore, it is very difficult to end such a friendship, but it is necessary. Realize that this is normal and even correct. In the end, your old friend feels the same way, knowingly or not. Agree, it is better to stop communicating with such a person than to maintain a strange friendship, in which there is no point, and meetings turn into a showdown and constant quarrels. Many of us end relationships with other people for the same reason, but when it comes to friendship, people here somehow feel guilty.
Of course, not every old friend is bad. We all know examples (or maybe we are direct participants) when people communicate and be friends for decades and it brings them pleasure. This means that they became friends not because they went to the same class, but precisely because they are interested in each other. We are talking about friends who have become such by coincidence of time and place circumstances and will not bring anything good in the future.
Light friends
This type of friend has two groups that may seem very different, but in fact turn out to be quite close to each other.The first group is friends with whom you do not mind maintaining a relationship, but they remain purely entertaining. With such a friend, you never talk about serious or personal topics, you just spend time with the company, go to the sea or walk around the city from time to time. By all accounts, they are your friends (you spend enough time with them for this), however, you keep them at a distance, this friendship is purely external.
The second group is people whom you have known for ten years, but at the same time see each other once or twice a year. You have a different life with such a person, you do not interfere with each other and only meet when both want it as much as possible. This state of affairs suits both parties and it makes sense not to change anything.
Curiously, easy friends never take offense at you if you cannot devote time to them, because it is quite difficult to call you real friends. With such a person, you can plan a meeting in six months and it will be absolutely normal for both.
Friends for growth
These are friends whom you can easily and happily represent in your future. They suit you in many ways, their human qualities delight you. When you think about them, one important thought creeps in: "I want this person to be in my life." You are happy to invite such people to your birthday and to any holiday that matters to you. These friends are not for quantity, they are for quality, they are a reason for pride.With such people, you feel comfortable and can spend the day and night. On them you want and can spend most of your free time and energy.
Friends for growth are just interesting to you. These are not forced acquaintances at work, these are the people whom you have chosen. You trust such friends. It means that you are sometimes even more frank with them than in front of yourself.
You respect such friends and it is mutual. It is important for you what they say and how they relate to what you said. You can be different, but you appreciate these differences and they do not become a reason for conflict.
Of course, there are not so many such people in the life of every person. At least because of the workload, the presence of a family and work. If you think you have ten friends to grow, then you are most likely wrong. And if you think about it, you will understand that there are, for example, three of them, and the remaining seven belong to the other two categories.
Despite the fact that there are not very many such people in your life, it always makes sense to make new acquaintances and get to know new people. Any person is developed and shaped by people and books. The more inspiring people and books are around you, the better you are as a person. Writer Jim Rohn said: "You are the psychological average of the five people you most often associate with." The smarter, smarter, more creative, and kinder people you are friends with, the better you become. This is inevitable, because we take people's habits, ways of thinking and behavior. You probably noticed how you started repeating some words and phrases of the person with whom you began to communicate. The same thing happens with our thoughts.
Therefore, pay attention to whether there are friends in your environment for growth and if not, meet people, communicate with them and take the best from them. This is normal and correct, and there is nothing reprehensible in it.
