? Learn from the past
When it seems (or you know for sure) that you made a mistake in the past, you need to find some benefit in the situation so that it is not so offensive. Ask yourself what lesson can be learned from what happened. Analyze the answers, draw conclusions, and to consolidate the results, write them down in a notebook. This will help not only ease the torment, but also avoid repeating the mistake in the future.
? Learn to forgive yourself and others
You can endlessly reproach yourself for a wrong act or a missed opportunity. Therefore, it is important to forgive - other people and yourself. Do not be cruel to yourself: everyone can make a mistake, even you, and this is normal, because only the one who does nothing is not mistaken. Life is not a computer game in which you can reboot and start from a saved moment.
? Work on the bugs
There are fatal mistakes in life that cannot be corrected. However, this is a rare thing: relationships can be improved with the help of apologies and good deeds, and a mistake at work can be made up with deliberate work. Remember this when you scold yourself for the wrong behavior. Spend the energy that goes into reflection, on correcting the mistake: think about the best way to do it, and get down to action.
? Remember why you did this
After some time after making a mistake, it seems that it would be logical to do otherwise, so we mercilessly reproach ourselves for mistakes. We forget that in the past we acted on the basis of the circumstances in which we were, and of all possible options, we probably chose the most logical solution. Remember this when you scold yourself: remember why you did this, and, most likely, you will see that you made an informed decision.
? Don't exaggerate your guilt
Many people consider themselves to be the center of the world, and their own mistakes seem catastrophic to them. However, more often than not, it's actually not that scary. Try to look at your mistake with an open mind: has your whole life gone downhill because of one mistake and it cannot be fixed? Or has it had dire consequences for other people? This is unlikely to be true, which means that you should not spend a lot of time on regrets.
? Take a look at yourself
We tend not only to sympathize with loved ones and friends, but also to forgive a lot. It would be worth treating yourself in the same way. Look at yourself through the eyes of a good friend, say words of consolation, and you will see that the error has swollen to the scale of a catastrophe only in your head, and to any other person it will seem not so all-encompassing. This will ease the inner agony and help you look at the situation soberly.
Do not forget that everything is possible in the future
When it seems like the world has collapsed because of a perfect mistake, think that there is still time ahead. Surely you can fix a lot in your life, because we rarely find ourselves in desperate situations. This will require effort and work, but it is better to spend it on future achievements than on self-criticism. The main thing is to learn to look ahead realistically, and not through the prism of already missed opportunities or wrong decisions.
? Radical acceptance
If no method has helped you deal with the pain of thinking about past mistakes, try radical acceptance. Sometimes no tricks of the mind can help explain your past behavior. Then there is only one step left - to accept and love your life as a whole, with all its victories and failures. This is partly reminiscent of the fatalist's position: well, since all this happened, so be it.
When it seems (or you know for sure) that you made a mistake in the past, you need to find some benefit in the situation so that it is not so offensive. Ask yourself what lesson can be learned from what happened. Analyze the answers, draw conclusions, and to consolidate the results, write them down in a notebook. This will help not only ease the torment, but also avoid repeating the mistake in the future.
? Learn to forgive yourself and others
You can endlessly reproach yourself for a wrong act or a missed opportunity. Therefore, it is important to forgive - other people and yourself. Do not be cruel to yourself: everyone can make a mistake, even you, and this is normal, because only the one who does nothing is not mistaken. Life is not a computer game in which you can reboot and start from a saved moment.
? Work on the bugs
There are fatal mistakes in life that cannot be corrected. However, this is a rare thing: relationships can be improved with the help of apologies and good deeds, and a mistake at work can be made up with deliberate work. Remember this when you scold yourself for the wrong behavior. Spend the energy that goes into reflection, on correcting the mistake: think about the best way to do it, and get down to action.
? Remember why you did this
After some time after making a mistake, it seems that it would be logical to do otherwise, so we mercilessly reproach ourselves for mistakes. We forget that in the past we acted on the basis of the circumstances in which we were, and of all possible options, we probably chose the most logical solution. Remember this when you scold yourself: remember why you did this, and, most likely, you will see that you made an informed decision.
? Don't exaggerate your guilt
Many people consider themselves to be the center of the world, and their own mistakes seem catastrophic to them. However, more often than not, it's actually not that scary. Try to look at your mistake with an open mind: has your whole life gone downhill because of one mistake and it cannot be fixed? Or has it had dire consequences for other people? This is unlikely to be true, which means that you should not spend a lot of time on regrets.
? Take a look at yourself
We tend not only to sympathize with loved ones and friends, but also to forgive a lot. It would be worth treating yourself in the same way. Look at yourself through the eyes of a good friend, say words of consolation, and you will see that the error has swollen to the scale of a catastrophe only in your head, and to any other person it will seem not so all-encompassing. This will ease the inner agony and help you look at the situation soberly.
Do not forget that everything is possible in the futureWhen it seems like the world has collapsed because of a perfect mistake, think that there is still time ahead. Surely you can fix a lot in your life, because we rarely find ourselves in desperate situations. This will require effort and work, but it is better to spend it on future achievements than on self-criticism. The main thing is to learn to look ahead realistically, and not through the prism of already missed opportunities or wrong decisions.
? Radical acceptance
If no method has helped you deal with the pain of thinking about past mistakes, try radical acceptance. Sometimes no tricks of the mind can help explain your past behavior. Then there is only one step left - to accept and love your life as a whole, with all its victories and failures. This is partly reminiscent of the fatalist's position: well, since all this happened, so be it.
