Life story reframing

[Teacher]

The stories you tell yourself are your life. We all tell stories. The stories we tell ourselves and others establish our identity and show who we are. They give meaning to life, help to comprehend the world and direct actions.

Therefore, you should always pay attention to what we constantly say to ourselves and others. We are not influenced by the objective world, but by how we represent and interpret it. The story can always be turned in any direction. That is, to make a reframe of a life story so that it helps and serves us.

Here are 4 ways to revisit your life stories and start creating a better life for yourself.

1. Describe a difficult problem

Professor James Pennebaker describes a method he has developed over the years, which is based on the use of written exercises to help you cope with difficult life events.

Do the following:

Think about what happened to you over 18 months ago. It must be something that you cannot get rid of until now.
Set aside 15-20 minutes at the end of the day to write about this issue. When you write, don't pause or censor yourself: just write without stopping. Write for yourself only. Be completely open.
Do this for four days in a row. However, you can use this exercise much longer if you like.
When people do this exercise, on the first day it seems too disorganized. But each time the story begins to come together, which makes it possible to comprehend it and give meaning.

Ask yourself: what have you learned from this experience, what have you lost, and what have you gained? Also, explore how these past events are guiding your thoughts and actions now and in the future.

Four days later, it turns out that you are now interpreting this story in a completely different way. It turns out that many fears are fictitious, and the situation can be viewed from a different angle.

2. Write about the current chapter of your life

Psychotherapist Kim Shneiderman argues that there are many ways to tell the same story, and we must always find the best version of it to make ourselves feel hopeful.

Here is a quote from her book Step out of your story:

“Trapped in the same old story, many of us believe so much in the ingrained tales of sacrifice and martyrdom that we can hardly imagine an alternative, positive and redemptive reading of our life story. Perhaps because we have been taught to view life through one particular lens, we simply do not see others, more inspiring, that could set us free. "

Think about the problem you're currently facing and write a story about it. Schneiderman recommends writing in the third person (not "I", but "he / she").

This story should contain:
Tie
Conflict
Protagonist (you)
Villain (person or circumstance)
Help
Interchange
Ask yourself how the conflict can be resolved. Also find out what the situation you are facing can teach you. Then, start creating the ending you want for your story.

3. Write an inspiring chapter

Michael Hyatt, a popular blogger and author, writes that when he was 29, he became vice president of marketing for a major publishing house. It was a huge step forward for his age, so he felt he didn't deserve it. Michael was convinced that managers would soon find they had made the mistake of promoting him.

Every time in the meeting, Michael sweated profusely and his hands were cold. He did everything to hide these symptoms of nervousness:

He put on two shirts, hoping that one of them would absorb sweat and he would not see through on the other
I washed my hands with hot water so that the people with whom he shook hands would not notice how cold they were
However, Michael soon realized that the root of his problem lay in the story he had invented. He told himself that he was a fake, and his body let down. Then he decided to rewrite his story and began to tell himself that his youth gave him an advantage, as he was energetic and had new, fresh ideas. In addition, he learned quickly and was able to correct mistakes quickly, almost on the go. As soon as he began to do this, he instantly relaxed. The symptoms described were gone, and the work was arguing.

Ask yourself:

What unpleasant stories do you tell yourself about yourself?
How can you make them positive and inspiring?
Rethink your life stories.

4. Create new stories

Your mind is always watching you. If you want your mind to start telling positive stories, go on stage and do something positive:

Want your mind to tell stories about what a good person you are? Help someone.
Do you want your mind to tell stories about your tenacity? Think about the goal you gave up and achieve it.
Do you want to seem bold and adventurous to yourself? Go on an independent journey.
Always be on the lookout for new opportunities to create positive stories about yourself and your life.