Imprinting theory

[Tomcat]

An imprint is not just some traumatic event in your biography. It is a belief or personality-forming experience.

It doesn't have to be traumatic. This is what is reflected in your personality ... The term “imprint” dates back to the late Konrad Lorenz, who studied ducklings from the moment they hatched from an egg. He found that, barely hatching from an egg, the ducklings were busy looking for a “mother image”. They looked for just one specific submodality to identify their mother. The only thing their mother had to do was move. If a moving object appeared, they began to follow it everywhere.

For example, when Lorenz walked, they started running after him. After a day or so, the mother's imprint in the ducklings ended. After that, they completely ignored even their real mother, if they tried to return one, and in this case they followed this elderly Austrian everywhere.

For one of the ducklings, such an imprint was a balloon, and when the balloon was moved from place to place, the duckling followed him everywhere. When this duckling grew up, he paid absolutely no attention to his fellow tribesmen, and all his courtship and desire to form a pair were directed to any round object. This suggests that when the duckling grew up, the mother's imprint also passed on to her friend.

I believe that this also manifests itself to some extent in humans. If in childhood the father punished the girl physically, then, as she grows up, she will create one curious stereotype for herself. Regardless of her logical understanding and how she would like to act, she will often develop relationships in which she will be abused, since this imprint is like an archetype that determines what a relationship with a man should be.

If in childhood a girl was subjected to a rude attitude from her mother, then when she grows up, it is quite possible that one way or another, she will be rude to her own children, hating herself for this and wondering why she does this ... This means that our early experiences not only affect our feelings, but also create very deep role models of relationships.

There are some transitional periods in life when you will need to resort to this role. Whether you like it or not, it may be the only role you have.

You are in second position with this role model. You kind of begin to play someone else's role. The power of this in-depth role-modeling process was first fully revealed to me when I was working with a woman with throat cancer. There was a stalemate in her recovery, and she finally stated, “I feel like my throat was taken away. It is as if my body is not mine at all. "

Therefore, I suggested that she focus on this feeling and go back in her biography. Suddenly, a very old memory opened up to her. This is how she described him: "I am still a very little girl, and my mother holds me and shakes me." But her facial expressions at the same time were the facial expressions of an aggressive mother, not a helpless child. Her voice was full of rage and cruelty. And then I thought, "She's not going back to being a little girl." With this behavior, she returned to the state of a mother who shakes a little girl. By bringing a resource to just a little girl, you cannot change that experience. Her entire nervous system is organized around her mother: she is the mother herself. The usual change in personal history will not help in this case. She has absorbed the role of her mother. Whether you like it or not, you will take on roles

Psychoanalysts call this identification with the aggressor. By creating models of the world, you are also building models of other significant people. When you build a role model, you may associate with it, especially if it affects your identity. Then it shapes your own life. As a child, you identify with one role in the family system. But what happens when you become an adult? Who you are? As one woman who was abused as a child by her mother told me: “When I was little and remembered these incidents, I always identified with the child: I was afraid. Now, when I myself am an adult, remembering this, I physically more easily identify myself with my mother. I can't be a child anymore. Therefore, I experience rage and resentment as much as fear. Now I am an adult: I am now a mother,

Steps in this process

1. Finding a dead end. First of all, we find the expression of the symptom in the present. We find out as precisely as possible: where is the impasse (symptom expression), what is holding you back from making a change or from moving forward.

2.Creating an associated timeline

I like creating a physical timeline because it helps organize the elements of the system in the same way that putting feelings along their access keys helps organize and keep them separate. Often in the minds of all such incidents that happened at different times, add up to a kind of hologram. And, of course, sometimes it's just overwhelming. It is much easier to handle all of these things separately. In addition, the limiting belief that was developed before gives rise to other beliefs and then others ... So if we can go back to the first belief and move it, everything else also starts to move and begins to regroup. All of this is much easier to do than trying to work with this belief in the present. It will look like dominoes

3. Transderivational search

So you contemplate a dead end or symptom expression, associate with the timeline, and allow yourself to move backward, leaving the dead end cases where they happened until you get to the very first one. All of this does not have to be done deliberately. You don't even need to be able to visualize to do this. Very often, as you follow the line of time, you find that something has happened in a particular place. You are not sure what exactly, but you will know that it is something important. Everything is fine. Just mark this spot and follow along. It doesn't always have to be conscious, that's why the physical timeline is good. Often you will know physically, although not consciously. So you go back until you come to the earliest event. Perhaps this is just the feeling that it is the very first. How you know it doesn't matter at all. We are not talking about objective reality. We're talking about something much more important: subjective reality that determines how you act.

4. Clarifying perspective before imprint

Next, we need to be one step earlier than the moment when the imprint occurred. Sometimes this is important. I have found that with many phobias, people have a “film strip” of an event that is played over and over. It has no beginning or end. Therefore, you say: "Go to the time preceding this event, when nothing threatened you, and then find the time when everything was already behind and nothing threatened you again." On both sides - both in the past and in the relative future - a safe space adjoins this event, and you know that it ends and that it even has a beginning when you could make some changes that could prevent it. I call this making the security sandwich.

For example, remember how we looked for the moment before Carla's imprint? She stepped over it, and we found ourselves where nothing had happened yet. Thus, we have established a place that preceded the period of time associated with this imprint.

This "security sandwich", of course, will not always allow us to solve the problem. Since we are interested in the beliefs shaped by the event, I want the person to remain associated in the imprint. I want the person to verbalize the beliefs or generalizations that have been formed by this experience. At this point, we are not trying to fix anything. We're just trying to discover beliefs.

5. Dissociation of a person from the timeline

When we dissociate from this, we literally go off the line into outer space and find ourselves outside of everything that happens, observing from the side: this is the event itself; this is what happened before; here's what happened next. This is how I organize the meta position. In addition, I want to find out what other beliefs exist in this position, since this perspective is different from the associated perspective. From within the experience, the conviction could be, "Oh, I'm a good girl, I'm a pleasure." As you dissociate, you may think, "This is disgusting and embarrassing." Belief on the timeline can be different from belief in a dissociated position. I cannot always understand the entire problem space as a whole, based only on the belief formed from one perspective: this is a whole system of beliefs. This is why you need to have a certain number of beliefs. Sometimes the persuasion here in the dissociated position can also be quite resourceful. I can suddenly realize that I was operating with the best resources I had at the time, with that limited outlook on the world.

6. The positive intention of the dead end

At this stage, you will need to identify the positive intent of this impasse.

Remember when we were out of line when I said, “This“ something ”is part of you and has a positive intention”? From the meta position, I want to find the positive purpose of this impasse: perhaps it was to protect me, or to prevent me from forgetting something important. How to set limits was part of the question of beliefs.

Each person in the relationship of the imprint required his own limitations. The child must know if it is good to be inventive and explore inner limitations. The mother must be able to set limits on the behavior of people who are dear to her. A man must become aware of his own limitations: what are the permissible limits of the game? This is all about where the acceptable constraints are located; How does a person establish criteria by which to determine how far one can go within a particular system while maintaining environmental friendliness? Also, notice that by dissociating and shifting to a meta position, we can identify any significant person in the experience and make sure we understand the intentions of any of those people.

7. Required resources

Now it is important to find out what the resources are and at what level different individuals needed them. These levels are important because sometimes you ask, "What did you want?" - and in response you hear: "I needed to be in the wrong place, I needed to be somewhere else." This is a resource of the external environment, and it is undoubtedly essential. But that's not all you need. You may need a behavioral resource to complete this change in your environment. “What behavioral resource would you need to be able to do something that would allow you to be elsewhere? What would it take you to find yourself in a different environment? "Of course, in order to carry out any type of behavior, you need to have inner knowledge and a broader perspective. You need abilities that you may have

Sometimes people say that they just needed to either flee or kill that person. This, of course, is just some kind of behavior that is not always the most acceptable or environmentally friendly choice for the entire system as a whole.

When you are at the level of behavior, it is very important to have several choices, a number of possibilities, as this will allow you to make an adequate choice. Thus, the ability to increase the possibility of choice is much more defining than any particular line of behavior. I can say, "My mother needed to say something to this person." “Saying something” is a certain type of behavior. But what is the ability that is required in order to know what to say? I need some communication skills here. I might need some good ideas from the NLP arsenal here. "It would be great if my mother owned NLP strategies." In order to confront the current situation and say what is necessary, I may need a resource at the level of belief or even at the level of identity. Again, at this stage we discover what resources are needed. It is possible that you may need resources at all levels. I don't think that under any circumstances you will have to climb all the levels. I suppose it's pretty obvious that Karla's imprint refers to a very significant situation, more significant than one finds in the lives of many other people. But regardless of the content, she had to face the questions that everyone has to deal with in life - without hiding from themselves and from reality. If someone says, “I just needed to know this and that” or “My mother ought to know such and such,” then this is, of course, an ability. In some cases, only this new ability is needed. Sometimes some people already have the resources of belief and knowledge of themselves, but no information. Sometimes people have information, but they try to deny it because they have no self-confidence. Therefore, it is important, while looking for the necessary resource, to ask the question: “At what level or levels is this resource needed?” And find the required resources for each perception position.

The ability to occupy many different perceptual positions is important not only in psychotherapy, but also in completely different fields. If you are the head of a company and you have no idea how your employees feel, think, or believe in, you will not be able to lead them well, because you have no idea what it is like to be in their place. After we have identified the required resource and found out at what level it is, we will need to get to this resource in this person, in our ward. It does not matter that the mother never possessed it, it does not matter that the child did not possess it at that time. The important thing is that this resource exists, and in the present our ward has access to it and can feel it. Even if it was in your life for only one moment, you can grab it, and if you combine it with an imprint, he will begin to exert more and more influence; will grow like a mustard seed. The main point here is not to fool the participants in the events about what actually happened. They can always remember what happened in reality. But instead of leaving these memories as a scar and throwing you into a state of confusion and loss of hope each time, you bring a solution to your memory. Thus, you will remember not only what happened in reality, but also about the decision you made. And this decision is genuine. With regard to personal history, it is important to remember that you are not the content of past experiences. what actually happened. They can always remember what happened in reality. But instead of leaving these memories as a scar and throwing you into a state of confusion and loss of hope each time, you bring a solution to your memory. Thus, you will remember not only what happened in reality, but also about the decision you made. And this decision is genuine. With regard to personal history, it is important to remember that you are not the content of past experiences. what actually happened. They can always remember what happened in reality. But instead of leaving these memories as a scar and throwing you into a state of confusion and loss of hope each time, you bring a solution to your memory. Thus, you will remember not only what happened in reality, but also about the decision you made. And this decision is genuine. With regard to personal history, it is important to remember that you are not the content of past experiences. And this decision is genuine. With regard to personal history, it is important to remember that you are not the content of past experiences. And this decision is genuine. With regard to personal history, it is important to remember that you are not the content of past experiences.

Source: Changing Beliefs With NLP Dilts Robert