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A healthy lifestyle and a "sport mode" are again in vogue - echoes of the eternal aspiration of the human race for immortality. Some particularly violent individuals even began to "hack" their bodies, calling it biohacking and naively believing that taking glycine would make them superhumans. Meanwhile, all these races to the source of eternal youth are not only meaningless, but also shorten the life of more alcohol and promiscuous sex. Hedonists will do much more for humanity and will live much longer than nutritionists and detox cults.
Greetings to everyone who survived the New Year's alcoholic apocalypse and is now focusing all their Jedi power on reading this article. In Russia, as usual, the New Year is a cult event. A mystical milestone, after which life will certainly change, and definitely for the better. Therefore, at the end of December, many joyfully hand out not only gifts, but also promises. They say that right after our permanent president utters his legendary "this year was difficult for all of us," they will stop smoking crayfish sticks, and, in general, will switch to a sports regime. A healthy lifestyle is gaining popularity again, and a person is more and more persistently raping his body in an attempt to become at least half a bump smarter or stronger than those around him. Particularly impressionable individuals even began to "hack"
So who are biohackers? This movement originated in sunny California in the mid-nineties. Crazy American geeks suddenly decided that they were no worse than the gloomy geniuses from the moldy basements of the CIA and began to equip laboratories in their garages, with test tubes and centrifuges. Fortunately, Amazon has already allowed to inexpensively collect the most real gene cannon from shit and "lotions for whipped cream", there would be brains. And instead of incubators for genetically modified bacteria, you can use "your own armpits, which maintain a temperature of 37 ° C for free." Actually, this is why biohacking can be described as garage biotech. However, reality is far from the terrible pictures drawn by the imagination, when a mad genius makes a new biological device of the doomsday on his knee. The biohacker community is quite open - it's just a group of people with a good imagination who are interested in practical biology without the bureaucratic red tape of scientific institutions. For example, one of these biohackers has created yogurt glowing in the dark, which you can eat without fear of health. So their goals are completely peaceful, no one creates a superbug to infect and destroy all of humanity. Probably.
Here the reader may wonder: "And what does human health have to do with it?" That's right, nothing to do with it! Old school biohackers don't experiment with their bodies or the human genome. Firstly, it is too difficult, and, secondly, because they have enough brains to understand it. But in Russia, for some reason, it has become customary to call hypochondriacs biohackers, who are as far from biology as they are from hacking computer systems. This has degenerated into a rather vague subculture with a pronounced fear of aging and death, whose adherents are close to many of the ideas of transhumanists. Such biohackers are fixated on finding bugs in their own bodies and trying to fix these bugs. They monitor their biomarkers diligently and do their best to live longer, run faster, jump higher, and beat their opponents harder. Serge Faguet, a successful American entrepreneur, can be considered an icon of biohackers. He became famous on the Russian Internet after his article, the essence of which boils down to the phrase: "I am 32 years old, and I spent $ 200 thousand on biohacking." The overseas millionaire kindly shares his technique with the servants, immediately laying out all the cards on the table. So, the system that will help Sergei become a superman and live to deep gray hairs consists of several interrelated blocks: sleep hygiene, optimal nutrition, optimal physical activity, mental health, medical tests, supplements and medications. The overseas millionaire kindly shares his technique with the servants, immediately laying out all the cards on the table. So, the system that will help Sergei become a superman and live to deep gray hair consists of several interrelated blocks: sleep hygiene, optimal nutrition, optimal physical activity, mental health, medical tests, supplements and medications. The overseas millionaire kindly shares his technique with the servants, immediately laying out all the cards on the table. So, the system that will help Sergei become a superman and live to deep gray hairs consists of several interrelated blocks: sleep hygiene, optimal nutrition, optimal physical activity, mental health, medical tests, supplements and medications. immediately laying out all the cards on the table.
Then it becomes clear that biohackermans have no trump cards. Behind the loud terms lies a simple radical healthy lifestyle with a touch of science. The statement that, thanks to a healthy lifestyle, you can last a little longer and feel a little better, in my opinion, should be clear to anyone. And all kinds of tests and analyzes, which are passed by "hackers" and which give biohacking all its scientific character, have been passed by all professional athletes for fifty years already. Hackers also like to take a handful or two of all sorts of wheels to improve their mental and physical performance. They love pills! Liberal American legislation and good doctors allow Phage to use as many antidepressants as any junkie can only dream of. In my opinion, when you are steaming with an infernal cocktail of major lithium, modafinil and phenibut, familiar to any St. Petersburg about # $! wasp, then in principle you should not have any problems. They just stop worrying you. At the same time, Serge emphasizes that all drugs are taken exclusively under the supervision of doctors, which means that all are tip-top. But if I were in his place, I would not be so sure, because every year a couple of Hollywood celebrities choke on their own vomit from drugs that they took exactly according to medical prescriptions. But here, too, the truth is that there is no magic pill that will make you a genius at the snap of your fingers. And the whole medical hack of the body comes down to taking banal dietary supplements, which absolutely all bald monkeys use in different combinations. So, with the same success, a biohacker can be called a student, then in principle you should not have any problems. They just stop worrying you. At the same time, Serge emphasizes that all drugs are taken exclusively under the supervision of doctors, which means that all are tip-top.
A separate area of such biohacking is gridding: upgrading your body using various implants. In theory, this is indeed a very promising trend. For example, there is the concept of an implantable testosterone pump that is controlled by bluetooth. Press the button - and you are no longer a frail nerd, but a top-notch alpha male. True, after that eggs may fall off as unnecessary (in the literal sense), but who cares? Some biohackers do not care about the feedback mechanism at all, and homeostasis for them is some kind of ancient Greek god. But even such a pump is the destiny of the future. And the present looks much more shabby, and the whole upgrade is limited to implanting cheap Chinese chips in the garage of a friend of the "herurg". Most often, these are ordinary NFC modules that are found in any smartphone or bank card today. Such chips do not give their owner any special advantages, but they add +5 to conceit and allow futuristic passage through turnstiles in the subway and no less futuristic payment for beer in a stall. In our country, especially on the periphery, it looks like a real cyberpunk: high tech - low life, as they say. Of course, if you have money, you can and stand out by embedding an earthquake sensor in your elbow, as the Spanish artist Moon Ribas did. A very useful implant. Only an oscilloscope in the buttock is more useful. as they say. Of course, if you have money, you can and stand out by embedding an earthquake sensor in your elbow, as the Spanish artist Moon Ribas did. A very useful implant. Only an oscilloscope in the buttock is more useful. as they say. Of course, if you have money, you can and stand out by embedding an earthquake sensor in your elbow, as the Spanish artist Moon Ribas did. A very useful implant. Only an oscilloscope in the buttock is more useful.
"And with a high probability I will live longer than 120 years even without any breakthrough technology - that is, a longer and healthier life than anyone else in human history." Here I agree with the American millionaire. I truly believe that Serge Faguet will live a long life. Simply due to the fact that, with millions in your bank accounts and access to the best doctors in the world, you need to try very hard to ditch yourself. And something tells me that businessmen in dressing gowns will make every effort not to lose such a wealthy client.
The human race has always been characterized by the desire for immortality. Only now, all these races to the source of eternal youth are not only meaningless, but also shorten the life of more alcohol and promiscuous sex. I do not understand all this panic fear of some people before death: they overestimate their life too much. Rather, what is considered life. Home, car, work, home. Weekdays, Friday, weekends. Maternity hospital, office, cemetery. Is this your amazing life that you cling to so much? Others exist in an eternal "standby mode": waiting for the New Year holidays, waiting for a vacation, waiting when it falls. "Here's a little more, and I'll live." But this is not life. You only live two weeks a year when you enjoy your vacation, two days a week when you are on your own, fifteen minutes a day when you make love. It is a smelly surrogate for life, a homeopathic brand of psychedelic GZN from a cheesy huckster, loosened up in gray mediocrity and routine. But no, many are still trying to stretch this pointless stretch with the help of detox juices and pills. They spend a lot of money to stretch their skin from their forehead to almost their ass and get rid of wrinkles. Just to look a little younger. To move the finish line slightly. Do you think death is waiting somewhere around the corner? Only now, as one person smarter than me said: death is a time that you have already existed. I did not live, enjoying every drop, but did not exist. For some reason, the human brain is so arranged: the majority are constantly interested in the question "how much?" How much you earn, how many you slept with, how much you lived. Although it would be better to ask the question "how?" homeopathic brand of psychedelic GZN from a cheesy huckster, loosened up in gray mediocrity and routine. But no, many are still trying to stretch this pointless stretch with the help of detox juices and pills. They spend a lot of money to pull their skin from their forehead almost to their ass and get rid of wrinkles. Just to look a little younger. To move the finish line slightly.
Sometimes, instead of buying a box of cheap vodka for the New Year, it's better to take one bottle of expensive cognac. And even if a glass of good brandy ends much faster than disgusting vodka, it will leave a more pleasant aftertaste. In addition, hedonists, who spun all this healthy lifestyle on a bottle of absinthe, will live much longer and will do much more for humanity than advocates of proper nutrition and "detox sects". Though they will die sooner. Voltaire drank fifty cups of coffee a day and did not pay much attention to his biomarkers. Jack London drank fifteen cocktails on especially cloudy days, and when that was no longer enough, he switched to whiskey. The bohemia of Parisian Montmartre, from which Renoir, Van Gogh, Modigliani and Picasso emerged, idolized the "green fairy". And about the revelry of Peter the Great and the "All-Sense Council" legends still go. And, what can we say, the entire basis of modern European philosophy, psychology and law is built on "symposiums": epic ancient Greek drinking, often turning into orgies. At the same time, however, it is worth remembering that the brain of all of the above characters worked like a steam boiler, and the fact that you thump like Yesenin does not yet make you a great poet.
But this is the past. And soon, if Donald and Kim do not merge in a passionate atomic tango, the future will come. Let's say you managed to live up to this wonderful moment. And here you are sitting, "old, but not obsolete", full of strength in your one hundred and ten years. You sit and look at the young and juicy nipples, at the sight of which you get an erection (with health, everything is fine). And they don't look at you. They, along with a bottle of whiskey, jump into a limousine to a young cloud rapper, and go to the Gucci store in St. Petersburg. And you continue to sit. You sit and think: "Somehow life has gone stupidly." But before that, as already mentioned, you still need to live. Otherwise, you can accidentally slip on the rails and get under the tram - no pills will help here, the tram still has more health. And now Jesus will look at you, or rather.
Greetings to everyone who survived the New Year's alcoholic apocalypse and is now focusing all their Jedi power on reading this article. In Russia, as usual, the New Year is a cult event. A mystical milestone, after which life will certainly change, and definitely for the better. Therefore, at the end of December, many joyfully hand out not only gifts, but also promises. They say that right after our permanent president utters his legendary "this year was difficult for all of us," they will stop smoking crayfish sticks, and, in general, will switch to a sports regime. A healthy lifestyle is gaining popularity again, and a person is more and more persistently raping his body in an attempt to become at least half a bump smarter or stronger than those around him. Particularly impressionable individuals even began to "hack"
So who are biohackers? This movement originated in sunny California in the mid-nineties. Crazy American geeks suddenly decided that they were no worse than the gloomy geniuses from the moldy basements of the CIA and began to equip laboratories in their garages, with test tubes and centrifuges. Fortunately, Amazon has already allowed to inexpensively collect the most real gene cannon from shit and "lotions for whipped cream", there would be brains. And instead of incubators for genetically modified bacteria, you can use "your own armpits, which maintain a temperature of 37 ° C for free." Actually, this is why biohacking can be described as garage biotech. However, reality is far from the terrible pictures drawn by the imagination, when a mad genius makes a new biological device of the doomsday on his knee. The biohacker community is quite open - it's just a group of people with a good imagination who are interested in practical biology without the bureaucratic red tape of scientific institutions. For example, one of these biohackers has created yogurt glowing in the dark, which you can eat without fear of health. So their goals are completely peaceful, no one creates a superbug to infect and destroy all of humanity. Probably.
Here the reader may wonder: "And what does human health have to do with it?" That's right, nothing to do with it! Old school biohackers don't experiment with their bodies or the human genome. Firstly, it is too difficult, and, secondly, because they have enough brains to understand it. But in Russia, for some reason, it has become customary to call hypochondriacs biohackers, who are as far from biology as they are from hacking computer systems. This has degenerated into a rather vague subculture with a pronounced fear of aging and death, whose adherents are close to many of the ideas of transhumanists. Such biohackers are fixated on finding bugs in their own bodies and trying to fix these bugs. They monitor their biomarkers diligently and do their best to live longer, run faster, jump higher, and beat their opponents harder. Serge Faguet, a successful American entrepreneur, can be considered an icon of biohackers. He became famous on the Russian Internet after his article, the essence of which boils down to the phrase: "I am 32 years old, and I spent $ 200 thousand on biohacking." The overseas millionaire kindly shares his technique with the servants, immediately laying out all the cards on the table. So, the system that will help Sergei become a superman and live to deep gray hairs consists of several interrelated blocks: sleep hygiene, optimal nutrition, optimal physical activity, mental health, medical tests, supplements and medications. The overseas millionaire kindly shares his technique with the servants, immediately laying out all the cards on the table. So, the system that will help Sergei become a superman and live to deep gray hair consists of several interrelated blocks: sleep hygiene, optimal nutrition, optimal physical activity, mental health, medical tests, supplements and medications. The overseas millionaire kindly shares his technique with the servants, immediately laying out all the cards on the table. So, the system that will help Sergei become a superman and live to deep gray hairs consists of several interrelated blocks: sleep hygiene, optimal nutrition, optimal physical activity, mental health, medical tests, supplements and medications. immediately laying out all the cards on the table.
Then it becomes clear that biohackermans have no trump cards. Behind the loud terms lies a simple radical healthy lifestyle with a touch of science. The statement that, thanks to a healthy lifestyle, you can last a little longer and feel a little better, in my opinion, should be clear to anyone. And all kinds of tests and analyzes, which are passed by "hackers" and which give biohacking all its scientific character, have been passed by all professional athletes for fifty years already. Hackers also like to take a handful or two of all sorts of wheels to improve their mental and physical performance. They love pills! Liberal American legislation and good doctors allow Phage to use as many antidepressants as any junkie can only dream of. In my opinion, when you are steaming with an infernal cocktail of major lithium, modafinil and phenibut, familiar to any St. Petersburg about # $! wasp, then in principle you should not have any problems. They just stop worrying you. At the same time, Serge emphasizes that all drugs are taken exclusively under the supervision of doctors, which means that all are tip-top. But if I were in his place, I would not be so sure, because every year a couple of Hollywood celebrities choke on their own vomit from drugs that they took exactly according to medical prescriptions. But here, too, the truth is that there is no magic pill that will make you a genius at the snap of your fingers. And the whole medical hack of the body comes down to taking banal dietary supplements, which absolutely all bald monkeys use in different combinations. So, with the same success, a biohacker can be called a student, then in principle you should not have any problems. They just stop worrying you. At the same time, Serge emphasizes that all drugs are taken exclusively under the supervision of doctors, which means that all are tip-top.
A separate area of such biohacking is gridding: upgrading your body using various implants. In theory, this is indeed a very promising trend. For example, there is the concept of an implantable testosterone pump that is controlled by bluetooth. Press the button - and you are no longer a frail nerd, but a top-notch alpha male. True, after that eggs may fall off as unnecessary (in the literal sense), but who cares? Some biohackers do not care about the feedback mechanism at all, and homeostasis for them is some kind of ancient Greek god. But even such a pump is the destiny of the future. And the present looks much more shabby, and the whole upgrade is limited to implanting cheap Chinese chips in the garage of a friend of the "herurg". Most often, these are ordinary NFC modules that are found in any smartphone or bank card today. Such chips do not give their owner any special advantages, but they add +5 to conceit and allow futuristic passage through turnstiles in the subway and no less futuristic payment for beer in a stall. In our country, especially on the periphery, it looks like a real cyberpunk: high tech - low life, as they say. Of course, if you have money, you can and stand out by embedding an earthquake sensor in your elbow, as the Spanish artist Moon Ribas did. A very useful implant. Only an oscilloscope in the buttock is more useful. as they say. Of course, if you have money, you can and stand out by embedding an earthquake sensor in your elbow, as the Spanish artist Moon Ribas did. A very useful implant. Only an oscilloscope in the buttock is more useful. as they say. Of course, if you have money, you can and stand out by embedding an earthquake sensor in your elbow, as the Spanish artist Moon Ribas did. A very useful implant. Only an oscilloscope in the buttock is more useful.
"And with a high probability I will live longer than 120 years even without any breakthrough technology - that is, a longer and healthier life than anyone else in human history." Here I agree with the American millionaire. I truly believe that Serge Faguet will live a long life. Simply due to the fact that, with millions in your bank accounts and access to the best doctors in the world, you need to try very hard to ditch yourself. And something tells me that businessmen in dressing gowns will make every effort not to lose such a wealthy client.
The human race has always been characterized by the desire for immortality. Only now, all these races to the source of eternal youth are not only meaningless, but also shorten the life of more alcohol and promiscuous sex. I do not understand all this panic fear of some people before death: they overestimate their life too much. Rather, what is considered life. Home, car, work, home. Weekdays, Friday, weekends. Maternity hospital, office, cemetery. Is this your amazing life that you cling to so much? Others exist in an eternal "standby mode": waiting for the New Year holidays, waiting for a vacation, waiting when it falls. "Here's a little more, and I'll live." But this is not life. You only live two weeks a year when you enjoy your vacation, two days a week when you are on your own, fifteen minutes a day when you make love. It is a smelly surrogate for life, a homeopathic brand of psychedelic GZN from a cheesy huckster, loosened up in gray mediocrity and routine. But no, many are still trying to stretch this pointless stretch with the help of detox juices and pills. They spend a lot of money to stretch their skin from their forehead to almost their ass and get rid of wrinkles. Just to look a little younger. To move the finish line slightly. Do you think death is waiting somewhere around the corner? Only now, as one person smarter than me said: death is a time that you have already existed. I did not live, enjoying every drop, but did not exist. For some reason, the human brain is so arranged: the majority are constantly interested in the question "how much?" How much you earn, how many you slept with, how much you lived. Although it would be better to ask the question "how?" homeopathic brand of psychedelic GZN from a cheesy huckster, loosened up in gray mediocrity and routine. But no, many are still trying to stretch this pointless stretch with the help of detox juices and pills. They spend a lot of money to pull their skin from their forehead almost to their ass and get rid of wrinkles. Just to look a little younger. To move the finish line slightly.
Sometimes, instead of buying a box of cheap vodka for the New Year, it's better to take one bottle of expensive cognac. And even if a glass of good brandy ends much faster than disgusting vodka, it will leave a more pleasant aftertaste. In addition, hedonists, who spun all this healthy lifestyle on a bottle of absinthe, will live much longer and will do much more for humanity than advocates of proper nutrition and "detox sects". Though they will die sooner. Voltaire drank fifty cups of coffee a day and did not pay much attention to his biomarkers. Jack London drank fifteen cocktails on especially cloudy days, and when that was no longer enough, he switched to whiskey. The bohemia of Parisian Montmartre, from which Renoir, Van Gogh, Modigliani and Picasso emerged, idolized the "green fairy". And about the revelry of Peter the Great and the "All-Sense Council" legends still go. And, what can we say, the entire basis of modern European philosophy, psychology and law is built on "symposiums": epic ancient Greek drinking, often turning into orgies. At the same time, however, it is worth remembering that the brain of all of the above characters worked like a steam boiler, and the fact that you thump like Yesenin does not yet make you a great poet.
But this is the past. And soon, if Donald and Kim do not merge in a passionate atomic tango, the future will come. Let's say you managed to live up to this wonderful moment. And here you are sitting, "old, but not obsolete", full of strength in your one hundred and ten years. You sit and look at the young and juicy nipples, at the sight of which you get an erection (with health, everything is fine). And they don't look at you. They, along with a bottle of whiskey, jump into a limousine to a young cloud rapper, and go to the Gucci store in St. Petersburg. And you continue to sit. You sit and think: "Somehow life has gone stupidly." But before that, as already mentioned, you still need to live. Otherwise, you can accidentally slip on the rails and get under the tram - no pills will help here, the tram still has more health. And now Jesus will look at you, or rather.
