You often hear that self-esteem needs to be worked on. But is it really that important? And if we nevertheless decided that it was time to correct it, then which tools are the most effective? Art therapist Polina Postelgina helps to understand the issues.
How can you determine what self-esteem you have at the moment? Are there any criteria for its norms?
“Self-esteem is a complex of a person's ideas about himself, his abilities and capabilities, qualities and inner value. We acquire these notions by comparing ourselves with others, taking into account external evaluation. And it helps to make decisions, set goals and objectives and fulfill them, - explains art therapist Polina Postelgina. - Self-esteem motivates to develop certain qualities and skills. Analyze your behavior and feel satisfied or, conversely, feel dissatisfied with yourself.
Working with her is not a tribute to fashion, but the harmonization of an important component of the psyche. It allows you to adapt in society: to find yourself in some kind of business and achieve success in it, show talents and abilities, establish relationships and feel belonging to a certain social group and humanity as a whole. "
Low self-esteem makes us insecure and forces us to give up ambitions.
Without the ability to evaluate oneself, the "social person" is nowhere. Another thing is that often self-esteem does not correspond to reality.
A balanced subjective self-image can serve as a criterion for adequate self-esteem. For example: "I'm good at this, but in another area I still need to work on myself in order to get a higher position." And this self-image is confirmed by the objective requirements of the employer.
Low self-esteem makes us insecure and forces us to give up ambition, even if we have the ability, to avoid contacts and opportunities, fearing failure. High self-esteem makes a person overly arrogant and arrogant. She often creates a deceptive view of her resources. Because of this, some important project may not be implemented and people who expect a specific result will suffer.
“As practice shows, the problem is most often in underestimating one's own importance, so self-esteem has to be increased. And very few people with an overestimated self-esteem will, of their own free will, strive to “descend from heaven to earth,” this is how we are made, ”explains the art therapist.
Self-esteem is formed closer to adolescence and "matures" to a young age, by the age of 22-25. “Until then, the assessments of other people are important to us, but as we grow up, we learn to rely on our own ideas and knowledge about ourselves and correct them. If this process is difficult and it is difficult for a person to assess himself adequately, you can turn to a psychologist and separate other people's projections from yourself, identify strengths, identify growth zones, learn self-support, ”notes Polina Postelgina.
Social standards are so arranged that a man's self-esteem can be underestimated if he shows sensuality and is faced with disapproval from loved ones and society. It is not accepted for a man to cry, he can only be upset. But if such a sensitive man finds himself in an environment where this quality is useful, for example, in the acting or other creative field, his self-esteem can be strengthened.
Women are often judged by their appearance. Since childhood, they are divided into beautiful and ugly, and soon the girl herself looks at herself with someone else's eyes. But the standards of beauty are changing rapidly.
Art therapy awakens in a person the ability to be a creator inherent from birth
“The psyche cannot instantly adapt to these changes. What was laid down in childhood can have a strong influence on the self-esteem of an adult, although it will not find confirmation outside. But I, as a psychologist, am convinced: each person has value, has a unique combination of personal qualities and properties, abilities and talents. All of them can already be the basis for feeling the value of oneself in society and the world, ”states Polina Postelgina.
Creativity, art therapy is a universal way to increase self-esteem. This awakens in a person the ability to be a creator inherent from birth: to manifest himself outside, to organize the world around him, to create, to invent something new and unique. This is the basis for self-respect and self-acceptance, says the art therapist.
“Unfortunately, we also often lose contact with this ability“ thanks to ”criticism and appreciation of our creativity. But art therapy can become the means and the environment where a person freely and recklessly manifests himself again, as in childhood. Over time, he acquires the ability to follow his creative energy, rely on it and trust her, and therefore himself.
In the course of art therapy, a person acquires beliefs: “I can, I can do it”, “I, my feelings and manifestations are valuable in themselves”. Interaction with color and tactile properties of visual materials also helps to relieve stress and enhance the adaptive qualities of a person, ”the specialist explains.
Draw a self-portrait (draw quickly without worrying about artistic value) and answer the questions:
Draw a large circle with a compass or plate. Fill the space inside the circle as you want, after saying to yourself: “This is me. I am a part of this world, and I am (such) what (what) I am. "
Take a look at the finished drawing:
Mandala is a harmonizing form and cut of the inner state. By drawing mandalas regularly, with a theme or just like that, you can balance your mood, relieve stress, improve contact with the inner world, find answers to exciting questions.
As a child, we often drew or made postcards for our loved ones: remember what delight and awe they caused! But even if someone did not appreciate such a gift, now you will have the opportunity to make it to yourself. Enjoy the creative process and write wishes and thanks to yourself, funny phrases or add kind drawings. Let this work serve as an anchor of self-support, love and attention to yourself.
Textual practices are also part of art therapy. If you are not ready to paint and create a postcard, or want to complement other techniques, write yourself a letter. As if you were writing to a friend. Share what you want, communicate something important, ask for advice or support. This practice allows you to get rid of tension and restrained feelings, sort out your thoughts, as well as establish and strengthen contact with yourself, learn self-support.
Create a personal coat of arms that reflects your achievements, values, uniqueness of personality, talents and goals - whatever you see fit. You can come up with a motto and put it on the coat of arms. Coats of arms often have animal-holders - this can be your "power animal".
Technique strengthens not only self-esteem, but also personality boundaries. As a result, we better understand our values and protect them symbolically: after all, the coat of arms is often depicted as a shield and is placed on roadside sites, where it marks the beginning of a new territory.
How can you determine what self-esteem you have at the moment? Are there any criteria for its norms?
“Self-esteem is a complex of a person's ideas about himself, his abilities and capabilities, qualities and inner value. We acquire these notions by comparing ourselves with others, taking into account external evaluation. And it helps to make decisions, set goals and objectives and fulfill them, - explains art therapist Polina Postelgina. - Self-esteem motivates to develop certain qualities and skills. Analyze your behavior and feel satisfied or, conversely, feel dissatisfied with yourself.
Working with her is not a tribute to fashion, but the harmonization of an important component of the psyche. It allows you to adapt in society: to find yourself in some kind of business and achieve success in it, show talents and abilities, establish relationships and feel belonging to a certain social group and humanity as a whole. "
Low self-esteem makes us insecure and forces us to give up ambitions.
Without the ability to evaluate oneself, the "social person" is nowhere. Another thing is that often self-esteem does not correspond to reality.
What are the criteria for the norm?
“Self-esteem can be adequate and inadequate: underestimated or overestimated. The key point here is that healthy, adequate self-esteem is true to reality. A person realizes his strengths and weaknesses, adequately evaluates opportunities, feels confident in communicating with other people - without superiority or without constraint and uncertainty, ”says the psychologist.A balanced subjective self-image can serve as a criterion for adequate self-esteem. For example: "I'm good at this, but in another area I still need to work on myself in order to get a higher position." And this self-image is confirmed by the objective requirements of the employer.
Low self-esteem makes us insecure and forces us to give up ambition, even if we have the ability, to avoid contacts and opportunities, fearing failure. High self-esteem makes a person overly arrogant and arrogant. She often creates a deceptive view of her resources. Because of this, some important project may not be implemented and people who expect a specific result will suffer.
“As practice shows, the problem is most often in underestimating one's own importance, so self-esteem has to be increased. And very few people with an overestimated self-esteem will, of their own free will, strive to “descend from heaven to earth,” this is how we are made, ”explains the art therapist.
Self-esteem is formed closer to adolescence and "matures" to a young age, by the age of 22-25. “Until then, the assessments of other people are important to us, but as we grow up, we learn to rely on our own ideas and knowledge about ourselves and correct them. If this process is difficult and it is difficult for a person to assess himself adequately, you can turn to a psychologist and separate other people's projections from yourself, identify strengths, identify growth zones, learn self-support, ”notes Polina Postelgina.
Social standards are so arranged that a man's self-esteem can be underestimated if he shows sensuality and is faced with disapproval from loved ones and society. It is not accepted for a man to cry, he can only be upset. But if such a sensitive man finds himself in an environment where this quality is useful, for example, in the acting or other creative field, his self-esteem can be strengthened.
Women are often judged by their appearance. Since childhood, they are divided into beautiful and ugly, and soon the girl herself looks at herself with someone else's eyes. But the standards of beauty are changing rapidly.
Art therapy awakens in a person the ability to be a creator inherent from birth
“The psyche cannot instantly adapt to these changes. What was laid down in childhood can have a strong influence on the self-esteem of an adult, although it will not find confirmation outside. But I, as a psychologist, am convinced: each person has value, has a unique combination of personal qualities and properties, abilities and talents. All of them can already be the basis for feeling the value of oneself in society and the world, ”states Polina Postelgina.
Creativity, art therapy is a universal way to increase self-esteem. This awakens in a person the ability to be a creator inherent from birth: to manifest himself outside, to organize the world around him, to create, to invent something new and unique. This is the basis for self-respect and self-acceptance, says the art therapist.
“Unfortunately, we also often lose contact with this ability“ thanks to ”criticism and appreciation of our creativity. But art therapy can become the means and the environment where a person freely and recklessly manifests himself again, as in childhood. Over time, he acquires the ability to follow his creative energy, rely on it and trust her, and therefore himself.
In the course of art therapy, a person acquires beliefs: “I can, I can do it”, “I, my feelings and manifestations are valuable in themselves”. Interaction with color and tactile properties of visual materials also helps to relieve stress and enhance the adaptive qualities of a person, ”the specialist explains.
TECHNOLOGY # 1. SELF-PORTRAIT
You will need: A4 white sheet, colored pencils or crayons.Draw a self-portrait (draw quickly without worrying about artistic value) and answer the questions:
- How would you describe this person?
- What strong qualities does he have?
- What is this person missing?
- What would you like to wish him?
- Is there something that you want to fix, change in the drawing? Do it on the same sheet or paint the portrait again.
TECHNOLOGY No. 2. MANDALA
You will need: A4 sheet of a pleasant color for you, pencils or felt-tip pens, a base for the circle.Draw a large circle with a compass or plate. Fill the space inside the circle as you want, after saying to yourself: “This is me. I am a part of this world, and I am (such) what (what) I am. "
Take a look at the finished drawing:
- What do you like about mandala?
- What are your qualities and properties?
- What message could this mandala give you?
Mandala is a harmonizing form and cut of the inner state. By drawing mandalas regularly, with a theme or just like that, you can balance your mood, relieve stress, improve contact with the inner world, find answers to exciting questions.
TECHNOLOGY No. 3. POSTER TO YOURSELF
You will need ready-made kits for creating postcards. You can use what is at hand: paper, paints, magazine clippings, ribbons, decor. Find the materials you like.As a child, we often drew or made postcards for our loved ones: remember what delight and awe they caused! But even if someone did not appreciate such a gift, now you will have the opportunity to make it to yourself. Enjoy the creative process and write wishes and thanks to yourself, funny phrases or add kind drawings. Let this work serve as an anchor of self-support, love and attention to yourself.
TECHNOLOGY No. 4. LETTER TO YOURSELF
You will need: a sheet of paper and a pen.Textual practices are also part of art therapy. If you are not ready to paint and create a postcard, or want to complement other techniques, write yourself a letter. As if you were writing to a friend. Share what you want, communicate something important, ask for advice or support. This practice allows you to get rid of tension and restrained feelings, sort out your thoughts, as well as establish and strengthen contact with yourself, learn self-support.
TECHNOLOGY No. 5. MY PERSONAL EMBLEM
You will need: colored paper and cardboard, paints and felt-tip pens, scissors, magazines and images, colored tape and other materials for decoration.Create a personal coat of arms that reflects your achievements, values, uniqueness of personality, talents and goals - whatever you see fit. You can come up with a motto and put it on the coat of arms. Coats of arms often have animal-holders - this can be your "power animal".
Technique strengthens not only self-esteem, but also personality boundaries. As a result, we better understand our values and protect them symbolically: after all, the coat of arms is often depicted as a shield and is placed on roadside sites, where it marks the beginning of a new territory.
