Hello! Living in a country where there is a presumption of guilt, the rules "What to do if you are accepted by the Guardians of the Galaxy?" are sometimes much more relevant and useful than the rules of kashrut…
So what should I do anyway?
If you are caught and are not sure what to do, first of all, keep silent.
No matter what the "free" lawyer tells you. By the way, I strongly do not recommend listening to this bird. You know, a free lawyer is like free cheese: either outright shit that's easier to throw away, or in a mousetrap. In short, if someone else does not know, the "free" defender works exclusively in the interests of the investigation, and he has no task to help you, from the word at all, just like a call. no.
Your tongue is your enemy.
If the lawyer hasn't got around to it yet, just keep quiet. The only thing you can say to prevent it from getting worse is:"I don't know anything, I didn't see anything, I didn't do anything."
Don't believe it.
You will definitely be intimidated by a long sentence and a harsh article — this is a favorite technique of all the guardians of the Galaxy: today they promise to solder you for 7 years and scare you with indisputable evidence, and tomorrow they write out an administrative offense for 500 rubles and let you go, because there is really no evidence.
In any case, do not believe what you are told!
For the investigator, his work is like a poker game for an experienced player: if there is a really good card in his hands, he will only calmly say"I'm playing", if it is empty, he will pretend to the last moment that he has at least a full house, if not a royal flush. Remember that for the Guardians of the Galaxy, you are a job in which the main thing is the result, that is, their task is to split you at any cost. If you do not share these plans, try not to listen at all to what they say, or listen abstractly, imagining nature, the sky, clouds…
Don't be afraid.
It will hurt — you will be patient, and bruises and even dislocations, which also happens, will pass.
And yes, you can and will be hurt, there are various ways and methods for this, we will not go into details now. But they will not be exactly crippled, because those who do this are professionals, not idiots.
If the stars are so coincidental that it was in your case that idiots were caught, rejoice: any normal lawyer will unwind the case in favor of the client if the client's carcass has obvious and provable damage.
In no case and under no circumstances do not insult the "employees", do not play cool, do not show that you are confident in yourself. Don't tell me you won't get hurt. Never say, " You can't prove anything anyway!" *where you get these phrases from, I really wonder.
Don't tell me you're going to be punished anyway, even if you are.
Even if you are sure that tomorrow you will leave and nothing will happen to you, do not try to say it out loud in front of the employee who registers you.
If you get caught-behave like an adequate passenger in a crowded subway car-do not give a show-off and wait in silence when you can get out. If you open the mitten, your story will not end 100% well.
Don't admit it.
Even if you think that everything is absolutely terrible, and you sat on a hard point-do not forget the worldly wisdom: "a sincere confession facilitates the investigation and is a direct road to prison."
You will be forced to give any explanations in writing.
Don't do this. Say that you refuse to testify against yourself, referring to Article 51 of the Constitution of the Russian Federation. Remember that no one has the right to force you to write something.
DON'T PICK UP THE PEN!
Don't touch her at all, do you hear?! Just once you touch it, and that's it, you hit it. Consider yourself surrendered. So you'll be rolled out.
Legend.
Don't explain anything verbally. From the word absolutely!
Have you come up with a competent legend that explains that you are not to blame? Well done. Remember it down to the last detail and keep quiet — don't tell this story to anyone, at least not until the lawyer arrives.
Your psyche will be hurt.
Be prepared for the fact that you will be long, diligent, diligent, with feeling, with sense, with arrangement, to take out the brain. The execution can continue indefinitely. Be patient in silence and don't fuck around.
You will definitely be told that if you are silent, then you are 100% to blame, because if you were not guilty, you would not be silent. This is also a standard trick that you should not react to. In this situation, the Guardians of the Galaxy need to force you to "say" something in any way. After all, in this case, you will lose the right not to testify in the future. Don't be fooled.
Speaking of birds, or a remark about birds…
As soon as you start to disown and freeze, you will be threatened in every possible way, among other things, they may promise to " throw you in the rooster's cell for the night."
Let's start with the fact that in the ROVD, in principle, there is no such thing as a" camera " in the standard sense. All that is available is a couple of temporary detention centers, that is, cold concrete cattle shelters where detainees are kept for a short time (by the way, there you can easily freeze your ass and adjacent systems...it is not recommended to lie down on bunks there, generally try to minimize contact with surfaces).
Secondly, roosters in the Russian Federation are still not enough for everyone. The chance of encountering such a character in a monkey house is negligible compared to having to do something to frighten inexperienced delinquents like you)
In short, as long as you don't end up in jail, which in turn happens only after an official court decision on taking into custody is made, there will technically be no one to punch you, even if you smoke to Sharon Stone and start talking in falsetto.
Then, in the pre-trial detention center, everything will fall into place and you will take the position that you deserve, regardless of the will of those who sent you there.
To sum up, the rooster trick, as well as many similar bullies, is part of the standard arsenal of the Guardian of the Galaxy. There is no need to react to such provocations at all. And in no case should you say: "Harosh intimidate me." Just keep your cool and quiet. Don't stop the deer from working))
How to deal with all this?
Think about the 300p Streamer's jokes about the faggot office and the clouds... About how beautiful they are, how birds fly there, how the sun shines and how good it is there... They will threaten and frighten — think about the clouds. They'll punch you in the face with all the dope for being silent with a detached look — as if you're thinking about clouds — think about clouds anyway.
I repeat, they won't knock out your teeth, they won't break your bones. And the bruises will heal in a week at most. If you are asked what you are thinking about, you can say "nothing" (but keep thinking about clouds yourself, this is a really effective method).
What are your main tasks before formal charges are filed:
Do you want a deadline? If not, keep quiet. And keep your legend a secret!
- So what should I do anyway?
- Your tongue is your enemy.
- Don't believe it.
- In any case, do not believe what you are told!
- Don't be afraid.
- Don't show off!
- Don't tell me you're going to be punished anyway, even if you are.
- Don't admit it.
- DON'T PICK UP THE PEN!
- Legend.
- Your psyche will be hurt.
- Speaking of birds, or a remark about birds…
- How to deal with all this?
- What are your main tasks before formal charges are filed:
So what should I do anyway?
If you are caught and are not sure what to do, first of all, keep silent.
No matter what the "free" lawyer tells you. By the way, I strongly do not recommend listening to this bird. You know, a free lawyer is like free cheese: either outright shit that's easier to throw away, or in a mousetrap. In short, if someone else does not know, the "free" defender works exclusively in the interests of the investigation, and he has no task to help you, from the word at all, just like a call. no.
Your tongue is your enemy.
If the lawyer hasn't got around to it yet, just keep quiet. The only thing you can say to prevent it from getting worse is:"I don't know anything, I didn't see anything, I didn't do anything."
Don't believe it.
You will definitely be intimidated by a long sentence and a harsh article — this is a favorite technique of all the guardians of the Galaxy: today they promise to solder you for 7 years and scare you with indisputable evidence, and tomorrow they write out an administrative offense for 500 rubles and let you go, because there is really no evidence.
In any case, do not believe what you are told!
For the investigator, his work is like a poker game for an experienced player: if there is a really good card in his hands, he will only calmly say"I'm playing", if it is empty, he will pretend to the last moment that he has at least a full house, if not a royal flush. Remember that for the Guardians of the Galaxy, you are a job in which the main thing is the result, that is, their task is to split you at any cost. If you do not share these plans, try not to listen at all to what they say, or listen abstractly, imagining nature, the sky, clouds…
Don't be afraid.
It will hurt — you will be patient, and bruises and even dislocations, which also happens, will pass.
And yes, you can and will be hurt, there are various ways and methods for this, we will not go into details now. But they will not be exactly crippled, because those who do this are professionals, not idiots.
If the stars are so coincidental that it was in your case that idiots were caught, rejoice: any normal lawyer will unwind the case in favor of the client if the client's carcass has obvious and provable damage.
In no case and under no circumstances do not insult the "employees", do not play cool, do not show that you are confident in yourself. Don't tell me you won't get hurt. Never say, " You can't prove anything anyway!" *where you get these phrases from, I really wonder.
Don't tell me you're going to be punished anyway, even if you are.
Even if you are sure that tomorrow you will leave and nothing will happen to you, do not try to say it out loud in front of the employee who registers you.
If you get caught-behave like an adequate passenger in a crowded subway car-do not give a show-off and wait in silence when you can get out. If you open the mitten, your story will not end 100% well.
Don't admit it.
Even if you think that everything is absolutely terrible, and you sat on a hard point-do not forget the worldly wisdom: "a sincere confession facilitates the investigation and is a direct road to prison."
You will be forced to give any explanations in writing.
Don't do this. Say that you refuse to testify against yourself, referring to Article 51 of the Constitution of the Russian Federation. Remember that no one has the right to force you to write something.
DON'T PICK UP THE PEN!
Don't touch her at all, do you hear?! Just once you touch it, and that's it, you hit it. Consider yourself surrendered. So you'll be rolled out.
Legend.
Don't explain anything verbally. From the word absolutely!
Have you come up with a competent legend that explains that you are not to blame? Well done. Remember it down to the last detail and keep quiet — don't tell this story to anyone, at least not until the lawyer arrives.
Your psyche will be hurt.
Be prepared for the fact that you will be long, diligent, diligent, with feeling, with sense, with arrangement, to take out the brain. The execution can continue indefinitely. Be patient in silence and don't fuck around.
You will definitely be told that if you are silent, then you are 100% to blame, because if you were not guilty, you would not be silent. This is also a standard trick that you should not react to. In this situation, the Guardians of the Galaxy need to force you to "say" something in any way. After all, in this case, you will lose the right not to testify in the future. Don't be fooled.
Speaking of birds, or a remark about birds…
As soon as you start to disown and freeze, you will be threatened in every possible way, among other things, they may promise to " throw you in the rooster's cell for the night."
Let's start with the fact that in the ROVD, in principle, there is no such thing as a" camera " in the standard sense. All that is available is a couple of temporary detention centers, that is, cold concrete cattle shelters where detainees are kept for a short time (by the way, there you can easily freeze your ass and adjacent systems...it is not recommended to lie down on bunks there, generally try to minimize contact with surfaces).
Secondly, roosters in the Russian Federation are still not enough for everyone. The chance of encountering such a character in a monkey house is negligible compared to having to do something to frighten inexperienced delinquents like you)
In short, as long as you don't end up in jail, which in turn happens only after an official court decision on taking into custody is made, there will technically be no one to punch you, even if you smoke to Sharon Stone and start talking in falsetto.
Then, in the pre-trial detention center, everything will fall into place and you will take the position that you deserve, regardless of the will of those who sent you there.
To sum up, the rooster trick, as well as many similar bullies, is part of the standard arsenal of the Guardian of the Galaxy. There is no need to react to such provocations at all. And in no case should you say: "Harosh intimidate me." Just keep your cool and quiet. Don't stop the deer from working))
How to deal with all this?
Think about the 300p Streamer's jokes about the faggot office and the clouds... About how beautiful they are, how birds fly there, how the sun shines and how good it is there... They will threaten and frighten — think about the clouds. They'll punch you in the face with all the dope for being silent with a detached look — as if you're thinking about clouds — think about clouds anyway.
I repeat, they won't knock out your teeth, they won't break your bones. And the bruises will heal in a week at most. If you are asked what you are thinking about, you can say "nothing" (but keep thinking about clouds yourself, this is a really effective method).
What are your main tasks before formal charges are filed:
- Don't give any evidence at all
- Try to maintain psychological balance as much as possible in principle.
- Having told any fairy tale or legend, even if you are not guilty of anything at least 10 times, you at least fall under the article about giving false testimony(for this "they" will only have to prove that at least one of the passages of your fairy talenot correspond to reality), and this is already a DEADLINE.
Do you want a deadline? If not, keep quiet. And keep your legend a secret!
