Self-soothing techniques

[Teacher]

Such negative emotions as anger, aggression and irritation take away a lot of mental strength. In this regard, we will consider the methods of stopping them, techniques, as well as three effective ways to gain composure in any critical situations.

Negative emotions, especially such as anger, aggression and irritation, take away a lot of mental strength, and therefore it is advisable to fall into such a state as rarely as possible, which seriously hinders entrepreneurial activity and, naturally, does not give an opportunity to create a positive business image. In this regard, it makes sense to consider the techniques and methods of their suspension.

1. Always separate the person and the problem. Focus on her. After all, it is more important. This will switch you from an emotional level to a rational one. Then it is easier and easier to resolve the contradiction. In addition, such a switch frees one from affect, a violent emotional reaction in which consciousness is turned off and the process of behavior is not controlled.

2. Introduce another person in your place. How would he behave in this situation? Play the role of this person. This will help you forget about yourself and cool your anger.

3. You can imagine the following picture. There is a glass wall between you and your partner. You see his annoyed gestures, but you don't hear what he says. There will be no need to answer with a “growl” too. Choose some detail in his toilet (a badly sewn button, a tie that has strayed to one side, etc.), look at it carefully, say thoughtfully: "You will lose a button, but there are no such buttons on sale." Hear in response: "What the hell is a button!" Show this one.

4. You boil with anger, ready to express hurtful words to your partner, but overpower yourself: calmly, you are confident in yourself, you are in control of yourself. Smile or fake a muscle smile. Imagine what a funny smile you have.

The following three methods of complacency are also very helpful.

1. Rationalization of anger. This method requires, first of all, to comprehend the cause that gave rise to anger, and give it a different meaning. You were ruled by your emotions and your mind was asleep. Wake him up. Learn the lessons.

Look for something positive about what happened. It is always there. Find it, and the situation will look a little different.

In anger, as a rule, a person achieves almost nothing. And you, too, did not achieve anything by giving free rein to your emotions. Ask yourself: "Is it very important to me what I have not achieved?" After such questions, you should feel funny if you have humor.

Analyze whether your partner had the same motives and intentions that you think of? And did he really want to humiliate you with his words or actions?

Check yourself again and mentally ask if you did everything so that your partner does not behave rudely and abusively. Apparently, he was unhappy with your actions, frankly. Tell yourself: "Yes, this type must have tremendous endurance and great respect for me, so as not to break down."

2. Visualization of anger. His technique is aimed at experiencing an event that will cool the anger. For example, a person has offended you. You are angry with him. But if you could see this person in any humiliating situation, you would have a feeling of satisfaction ("Serves you right"), perhaps even pity for him. And your anger would most likely disappear.

The visualization technique teaches that the entire conflict situation is played in the imagination, as if on an internal screen, and thereby extinguish anger. To visualize, you need to relax, focus on internal sensations and normalize breathing. The following options for visualizing anger can be recommended:

1) reduce the height of the person who caused your anger. Let him be a dwarf, a gnome, or a bug;

2) try to see this person in a funny way;

3) imagine anger in the form of a beam of energy that goes through you to the ground;

4) come up with an imaginary revenge scene in relation to your abuser and enjoy the revenge (only in your imagination, of course).

3. Relaxation (the strength of the connection between the nervous and muscular systems). Her technique is based on relaxation of the muscular system, followed by the relaxation of the nervous system. Using this technique, you must proceed in the following sequence.

1) First, try to soften your anger and aggressiveness. Let them come out of you and don't hold them back. Take this time to do some physical work.

2) Then relax as much as possible, do a little auto-training and muscularly depict a smile on your face. Let it look like a grimace at first. Look at yourself in the mirror. Your appearance will really make you smile, but not artificial, but real, but, it is true, very ironic.

3) To calm down faster, you do not need to walk quickly around the room. Better stop and focus on your inner feelings. Watch your breathing. Try to keep it as deep as possible.

4) Do not rush to answer your, apparently, also a heated partner. Pause as long as possible. Such a pause will allow you to calm down faster, better concentrate and find a decent answer. At the same time, do not seek to take revenge on your partner or hurt his pride with any word. Remember to "save face" both for yourself and for him.

As you know, negative emotions affect our hearing more. Therefore, in stressful situations, attention should be focused not on negative auditory sensations, but on visually perceived objects.

The annoying opponent continues to say something that causes negative emotion. To isolate yourself from the action of his speech, try to see his face - as clearly as possible, in all details, as if you were going to then draw his portrait from memory.

One should look silently, very carefully, but not “stare,” but precisely examine in order to see. During this deliberate pause, when you are silent, try to see as much detail as possible next to your heated opponent.

Whoever your opponent is - boss or subordinate, senior or junior - your sudden, unexpected silence will certainly cause him bewilderment: his emotional tension will begin to weaken.

Consciously maintained calmness is always a manifestation of fortitude and therefore gives a huge advantage, possessing great power of influence. It is only necessary that your silence and consideration should not be perceived by your opponent as a manifestation of hostility and ironic attitude towards him.