15 key points of NLP
Konishua guys)) This is Stalilingus !! I throw off a very high-quality copy-paste,
these are informational whales that support
NLP. The so-called NLP fundamentals describing theories of successful communication.
The first position of NLP. Each person is unique and perceives reality in his own way.
People are different from each other. Everyone is one of a kind. In addition, we all unconsciously tend to think of ourselves as the center around which our own world revolves.
Accepting the uniqueness of others means recognizing their value, respecting their individuality, admitting that someone is different and not “better” or “worse”. This also means that each person perceives the world around him in his own way and reacts to external stimuli of his choice. This refined selection results in personal conclusions, priorities and images that can be freely combined with each other.
The second position of NLP. Spirit, body and environment interact with each other and form a single system.
A person's spiritual attitudes affect his mental and physical well-being, and his behavior affects his thoughts. If in this system at least one component changes, the whole of it changes, restructured.
The third position of NLP. Any behavior is communication.
Any of our behavior broadcasts messages to the outside - it doesn't matter whether it is gestures, posture, or even silence. The behavior of a person is the only visible, audible and experienced indication of the internal processes of information processing. The abilities and characteristics of a person cannot be recognized immediately, they can only be recognized by his individual behavior. Everything else is just speculation, judgment and interpretation.
The fourth position of NLP. The meaning of communication is determined by the reaction it evokes.
Here we are talking about one important issue of communication: who exactly is responsible for the success of communication - the one who reported the news or the one who perceived it? “You misunderstood this” and “I expressed myself exactly” - such statements reflect opposite poles. If an unwanted reaction arises in communication, do not immediately shift the blame onto the recipient. The sender of the message is also responsible for ensuring that the addressee understands it correctly.
The recipient is important, not the sender. It is not about the intention of the latter, not about what he wanted to say, but about what was conveyed to the interlocutor, what he could or wanted to understand. The sender must take responsibility for their message.
Fifth position of NLP .
People are guided by mental maps.
The map is not the area, just as the menu is not food, and the notes are not music. This is a prototype of reality, a model of the present. The map shows us the area where we are and how far we are from our goal. This is true not only for street signs, but also for orientation in the world in general.
Mind maps preserve emotional experiences. They are not the real world, but they can help us navigate in it. Although we all have mental maps, we use them in different ways, depending on our preferences in perception. These differences are often the cause of conflicts and misunderstandings. The first step to understanding and communicating successfully is getting to know each other's mind maps. The fact is that different mental maps manifest themselves in different ways in speech: the so-called "marked" words and different meanings are used.
Mind maps can be used for a variety of purposes. Consciously or unconsciously, we focus on them in our behavior. We cannot change reality, but we can change our mental maps: their scale, assessment criteria, use for various purposes, etc. If we succeed, the value of the map increases. The potential of the card lies in personal choice.
Sixth position of NLP. It is better to have a choice than not to have one at all.
It doesn't matter whether it is about choosing from a huge number of products or about our actions. It's good to have it. NLP methods open up new horizons for us and offer alternatives. But real choice only comes when there are at least three different options.
- If there is only one way out, this is actually coercion, a necessity.
- Two possibilities are still better than coercion, but here a dilemma arises: either-or.
- Only in the presence of three or more alternatives does a real choice, a free decision, appear.
The seventh position of NLP. People choose the best that they have at their disposal at the moment.
Each of us goes through life in our own way. At the same time, he learns what he can do and how best to do it. As a rule, we choose only those options that bring us the most benefit. If a person does not see sufficient benefits or is faced with problems, he should look for new behaviors that are most suitable for solving the problem.
Eighth position of NLP. Any behavior makes sense.
This means that in their own world and according to their mental map, people always do the right thing. Perhaps the observer does not always see meaning in the behavior of another person, but from the point of view of the actor, there is meaning.
The ninth position of NLP. Positive intention is at the core of all behavior.
This position of NLP is often viewed with skepticism. How can be positive behavior that has a negative impact on other people, for example, when an employee intentionally does not inform her colleague about something? This position draws the line between a person's behavior and his intentions and means that, according to the mental map of the actor, such behavior is correct and beneficial. Often, the perceived benefit hidden behind unproductive behavior is referred to as a secondary benefit.
Tenth position of NLP. Any behavior is justified in a certain context.
Human behavior is only appropriate and effective when it depends on the situation. However, often a demeanor that is successful in some situations is transferred to others, where it is no longer appropriate and leads to negative consequences. In each context, it is important to define appropriate behavior.
Context Dependency Example
Assault in life-threatening situations may be appropriate. In other cases, it is considered a crime.
Eleventh position of NLP. People have all the resources necessary for change.
Each person has a huge amount of resources and abilities that he does not fully use. The essence of this provision is that people learn, "grow" and can more and more fully use their potential.
The twelfth position of NLP. You can learn everything that another person can do.
NLP assumes that whatever one person has ever learned and mastered to perfection, anyone else can also learn. Ideal behavior can be, so to speak, "spied", adopted from another. Motivation, dynamics, decision-making ability, creativity, self-confidence and other abilities can be developed in oneself. The first steps in NLP are based on this position. We are talking about studying a model and going through the same neurological processes during the educational process, using the same mental maps. Success and excellence have the same structure and can be learned.
Thirteenth position of NLP. Refusals do not exist, there is only feedback.
Getting stuck in the past is a mistake; it distracts us from our intended goal. If a person views the goal as a new chance, perspectives change. From this point of view, mistakes push us towards new solutions, determine the degree of further improvements, and reveal the path to the goal. Test questions: how to extract new opportunities from mistakes.
Ask yourself the following questions:
- What has been achieved to date?
- What knowledge can I learn from this?
- What is already going well?
- What else needs to be done?
- What can I do instead of the accepted solutions?
- What other options are available?
- What alternatives are there on the way to the goal?
- What is the current situation a chance for?
The fourteenth position of NLP. If everything you do doesn't help, try something else.
This provision only applies when there is a choice. Many people, when faced with problems, do not change their usual behavior and even aggravate it, for example, they start screaming if there is a misunderstanding. Naturally, this behavior does nothing.
Flexibility - the willingness to accept something completely different, often leads to a good result. Opportunities for personal development lie precisely in the creation of new perspectives.
This point of view is based on the denial of guilt: others are not to blame for my situation. I do not expect my environment to change in order for something pleasant to happen. I take full responsibility for myself and change my behavior.
The flexible use of alternatives also applies to the NLP provisions themselves: if the situation no longer helps in the current situation, it would be more expedient to try something else. The provisions of NLP do not claim to be absolute truth and should be tested on our own experience.
The fifteenth position of NLP. A flexible element in the system controls it.
Being flexible means having a lot of possibilities. The people who show their flexibility and you who make new proposals are not going to be stumped anytime soon. The more alternatives to action a person has, the easier it will be for him to evoke the desired reaction when communicating with the interlocutor.
An example of flexible problem solving
At one meeting, the discussion comes to a standstill, none of the participants wants to give in. One participant takes the opportunity to suggest a new way of thinking, method, or change. This can be a short, creative break, a change of place, an address to the speaker, etc. This colleague shows himself to be a flexible element of the group and, through his proposals, creates opportunities for leveling the situation. However, it has a significant impact on the system.
This is how our perception functions according to NLP.
There are many theories about how a person thinks. NLP assumes that for this he uses feelings, ie when we think or remember, we see images, hear sounds, smell and taste, feel touches. This means that all thought processes are associated with sensory experiences. The meaning is perceived through feelings, processed and only after that it is clothed in thoughts.
Source: Barbara Seidl - NLP: Models of Effective Communication.
