Dealing with emotions through dissociation

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The experience of emotion is associated. That is, a person and his experiences are inseparable. The point of this exercise is to look from the outside at your emotion - to dissociate. What does it do? First, you can track, notice, what is happening. Secondly, this separation helps to significantly reduce the importance of emotional experience. Third, start doing something. For example, recording on a video camera a family conflict, accompanied by a storm of emotions, greatly helps the spouses to understand who and what was doing, how he reacted in this situation. Some are surprised: "Is it really my face." There is additional motivation to work with negative emotions.

1. When in a state of emotional arousal, look in the mirror.

If there is no mirror, imagine yourself from the side - how you look. The task is simply to notice what is happening to the face, wrinkles appear, skin redness, tears, etc.

2. Separate yourself and your emotion.

The experience is not the essence of a person. For example, anger is just one of the manifestations of different states in which a person can be. Imagine that your emotion "lives" separately, and you observe it. Do nothing, just look, let yourself "live".

3. Try mentally "pushing" the emotion some distance.

Usually, as the distance increases, the experience becomes less intense. Slowly move your emotion away until it becomes subtle. You can make it black and white. At the same time, observe your state, if the intensity of the experience of the emotion decreases - well, you can not return it, let it “live” in the distance. If you need it for some reason, mentally bring it back to you. Leave at a distance where you feel comfortable.

The practice of dissociating from your negative emotions will be beneficial if repeated periodically.
 

Acting practices, thanks to which you will learn how to masterfully express your emotions​


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- Master the technique of anchoring.
This technique comes from neurolinguistic programming, which has taken root in the acting world, as it easily helps to enter the desired emotional state. Its essence is in the performance of certain ritual actions.
Remember a time in the past when you experienced this or that emotion. Close your eyes, immerse yourself in the memory and find the necessary feeling within yourself. When the emotion is strong enough, do something: cross your fingers or stamp.
To consolidate the effect, this exercise must be done several times. Now you can easily enter the emotional state you need when you need it.

- Think about the interlocutor
This is necessary in order to better feel him, to understand how he breathes. By reading the emotional state of another, assuming what he is feeling, you will understand where you are close. And that inner closeness with another will allow you to better define your emotions.

- Interact
Express your emotions by involving your environment. Do not be afraid to be bright, noticeable, sparkle with colors. Your emotions come alive as you interact with your surroundings.

- Develop body plasticity
Poses, gait, facial expressions, gestures - all this has a meaning and should correspond to the emotions that you show. And this is not only about those cases when we do not have enough words or words are not needed. The body is the first to react to what we feel, and responds with a look, any movement.
Try to say something without words, using only your body. This may be the most common story about how you got to work today. Do your counterparts understand your body movements? Do you feel a bunch of eyes, lips, posture? Where are your hands? What are you talking about with foot movements?

- Experiment with a palette of emotions
The basic emotions identified by Paul Ekman are joy, surprise, sadness, anger, disgust, fear, contempt. Don't be limited to them: Express shock, boredom, aggression, awe, forgiveness, envy, sympathy, hope, enthusiasm, relief, tenderness, and so on.
Try to list 10 varieties of each basic emotion.

Have fun distinguishing shades

- Watch others
See how others tell stories, deliver bad news, and speak to an audience. Try to guess what emotions they are experiencing at the same time, what their gestures and facial expressions indicate.
Observing others will increase your emotional competence dramatically. And watching a video where you are in the lead role will allow you to catch what you are missing.

- Select a text from a book and retell it to different people
These should be people from your environment: mom, daughter, friend, colleague. Tell it as if the story really happened to you. It is important that your interlocutors do not guess that this is an excerpt from a book.
For more immersion, you can change the names of the characters to the names of your friends. You can complete the story. If you suddenly remember with surprise that there is also a real author, then you are on the right track.

- Use counterpoint - contrast between sound and image
When you talk funny about sad or, on the contrary, sad about funny, you begin to feel thinner, your inner emotional ear becomes more receptive. Use the classics of drama: look for evil in good, and in evil - good. Try to tell an ordinary story with emotions that are opposite or far from the meaning of the text.

- Listen to the music. Especially without words
Music helps to develop imaginative thinking and find meanings that cannot be expressed in words. Music interacts with emotions directly without affecting our mind.
It is useful not only to listen to music, but also to play it. If you don't know how to play any musical instrument, sing it! Sing boldly and with inspiration, without words, completely surrendering yourself to this activity, as if there is no other way to convey the meaning but to sing.

- Breathe correctly
Breathing is closely related to how we feel. With the help of certain breathing exercises, one or another emotion can be evoked. There are a large number of breathing practices today, but the basis of any is inhalation and exhalation.
It is possible to achieve a peaceful state through slow deep breaths and exhalations. And with the help of quickened or, on the contrary, bated breath, you can enter the expressive-emotional state you need.
Of course, these are not the only techniques for managing emotions. Try, train, look for what is right for you, and most importantly - enjoy the conscious manifestation of your multifaceted personality!
 
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