9 types of psychological defense that are important to realize in time

[Lord777]

The protective mechanisms of the human psyche are aimed at reducing negative and traumatic experiences and are manifested at an unconscious level. This term was introduced by Sigmund Freud, and then developed more deeply by his students and followers, primarily by Anna Freud. Let's try to figure out when these mechanisms are useful, and in what cases they inhibit our development and it is better to react and act consciously.

This is what the psychotherapist does most of the time in his office - he helps the client to comprehend the protective mechanisms that limit his freedom, the spontaneity of his response, and distort his interaction with the people around him.

1. Displacement
Repression is the elimination of unpleasant experiences from consciousness. It manifests itself in forgetting what causes psychological discomfort. Displacement can be compared to a dam that can break - there is always a risk that memories of unpleasant events will burst out. And the psyche spends a huge amount of energy to suppress them.

2. Projection
Projection is manifested in the fact that a person unconsciously ascribes his feelings, thoughts, desires and needs to the people around him. This psychological defense mechanism makes it possible to relieve oneself of responsibility for one's own character traits and desires, which seem unacceptable.

For example, unfounded jealousy may be the result of a projection mechanism. Defending against his own desire for infidelity, a person suspects his partner of treason.

3. Introjection
This is the tendency to indiscriminately appropriate other people's norms, attitudes, rules of behavior, opinions and values without trying to understand them and critically rethink them. Introjection is like swallowing huge chunks of food without trying to chew it.

All education and upbringing is built on the mechanism of introjection. Parents say: “Don't put your fingers in the socket, don't go out into the cold without a hat,” and these rules contribute to the survival of children. If a person in adulthood "swallows" other people's rules and norms without trying to understand how they suit him personally, he becomes unable to distinguish between what he really feels and what he wants and what others want.

4. Merger
In fusion, there is no border between "I and not-I". There is only one total "we". The fusion mechanism is most clearly expressed in the first year of a child's life. Mother and child are in fusion, which contributes to the survival of the little person, because the mother is very sensitive to the needs of her child and responds to them. In this case, we are talking about a healthy manifestation of this defense mechanism.

But in the relationship between a man and a woman, fusion inhibits the development of a couple and the development of partners. It is difficult to show your individuality in them. Partners dissolve in each other, and passion leaves the relationship sooner or later.

5. Rationalization
Rationalization is an attempt to find reasonable and acceptable reasons for an unpleasant situation, a situation of failure. The purpose of this defense mechanism is to maintain a high level of self-esteem and convince ourselves that we are not to blame, that the problem is not with us. It is clear that it will be more beneficial for personal growth and development to take responsibility for what happened and learn from life experience.

Rationalization can manifest itself as depreciation. Aesop's fable "The Fox and the Grapes" is a classic example of rationalization. The fox cannot get grapes in any way and retreats, explaining that the grapes are "green".

6. Denial
This defense mechanism allows you to ignore (deny) the obvious facts, protecting the psyche from injury. This is a complete rejection of unpleasant information. Denial is often the first reaction to the pain of loss.

7. Regression
Regression allows us to adapt to a traumatic situation due to an unconscious return to the forms of behavior habitual since childhood: crying, whims, emotional requests, etc. We unconsciously learned that such forms of behavior guarantee support and safety.

Regression makes it possible to throw off the burden of responsibility for what is happening: after all, in childhood, parents were responsible for a lot. Abuse of regression leads to a lack of a successful life strategy, difficulties in relationships with people around and the emergence of psychosomatic diseases.

8. Sublimation
Sublimation is manifested in the fact that, in an attempt to forget about a traumatic event, we switch to activities that are acceptable to us and those around us: we begin to engage in creativity or sports. Sublimation is a productive defense mechanism that has given the world a huge amount of art.

It is much more useful both for oneself and for society to write poetry, paint a picture or just chop wood than to get drunk or beat a more successful rival.

9. Reactive education
In the case of reactive education, our consciousness is protected from forbidden impulses, expressing opposite motives in behavior and thoughts. This protective process is carried out in two stages: first, the unacceptable impulse is suppressed, and then at the level of consciousness the completely opposite appears, while being quite hypertrophied and inflexible.

 

[Teacher]

Psychological secrets

Salute, fans of fucking up someone else's account, now, we will talk about psychological secrets that will make you charming and sociable.

To please people, you need to love yourself! Only when we consider ourselves attractive and accept ourselves for who we are, respect our dreams, desires, ideas, and character traits, do we attract others to us. There are no perfect people, and perhaps not everyone will like you, but those who fall under your personal charm will treat you sincerely and with respect.

Self-love, self-confidence, and sincerity are the three qualities that make people like us. In order to strengthen them and start attracting good people into your life without putting on flattering or flirty masks, you can take certain actions. I want to tell you about them in this article.

Decide who you are and what you are. Preferably in writing, thoughts on paper are usually more structured than in the head. In order to take concrete actions, you must clearly understand all your pros and cons. Describe your life philosophy, your attitude to various things and spheres of life, such as family, friendship, politics, religion, and health. Tell us about what you value most in this life, what you dream about, and what you have already achieved. You can write your manifesto without killing two birds with one stone — decide on yourself and tell other people about yourself.

Never adapt to others or try to stand out from the crowd on purpose. Don't forget, we need sincerity and naturalness! Do what you think is right, not what others like.
Don't sacrifice what's really important to you. If you lose motivation and joy in life, then all the work on yourself will go down the drain.
Trust your instincts and allow yourself to experiment. Learn from experience what things make you happy and look for them, even if you have to make a few mistakes.

See others as they are. Stop judging and criticizing people. Pay attention to their positive aspects, not their mistakes. Learn to communicate with difficult people calmly, not through force.

Listen to people. Just listen and try to understand without interrupting or deviating from the topic. Make it clear that the other person is really interesting to you.

Do not delay solving problems. If something negative appears in your life, act quickly, decide in one way or another, and put it out of your mind. Nothing should take you out of a state of inner calm and balance.

If you have decided to solve a problem, then solve it to the end. Even if you have to make sacrifices, do not delay your decision, be firm and 100% confident.
Lead a healthy lifestyle. Do some exercise and eat healthy foods that will benefit your body.
Don't be a slave to your eating habits, and you'll really respect yourself for it. Be active.
Never wait for the weather "by the sea", act, inspire others, invent, create.

Help others. Do not just listen to their problems, but try to help them with something-advice or business. Do not be selfish and do something for other people, even if it will require you mentally or physically. But this should not contradict points 2 and 3!

Appreciate and support the best qualities of people. See them not only as they are, but also as they might have been in a better situation. When a person notices that others (you, for example) appreciate in him what he considers a small thing, he becomes happier.

Speak positively and to the point.
Encourage, motivate and inspire instead of criticizing or "digging in".
Stop gossiping. Don't talk about others in a critical tone and don't tell them the secrets you've been entrusted with. Smile and laugh.
A smile is the key to other people's hearts, so try to be less serious, make jokes more often, tell jokes and stories, and generally make others laugh.

Ask, but don't complain. If you need something, just ask for it, but never try to push for pity. "Attractive" and " pathetic — are antonyms. Don't make the other person feel guilty. Even if you know that they didn't make the best choice, don't try to tell them that now they're going to have problems and feel bad. Don't be patient if something causes general indignation.

Do not forget about point 10 — you can not expect that everything will come to its senses, you can not hide and try to keep silent when an injustice occurs in front of your eyes. Go ahead. Don't get personal in the dialog. If you're running out of sound arguments, you'd better smile and walk away, but don't engage in a verbal altercation. The other person may think you are a coward, but unlike them, you will look like a reasonable and calm person in the eyes of others.

Offer your help only when you are asked for it. Don't push yourself and try to solve the problems of others just because you think you are a better specialist in some area than they are. Be adequate, otherwise harm may result instead of help.

Don't judge people by their appearance. Wealth, fame, and appearance may not mean anything when it comes to serious life situations. The real value is represented by those who have a good heart and a pure, sincere soul inside. Unfortunately, this is not immediately apparent, so learn to understand people.

Don't say yes when you want to say no. It is better to immediately refuse than agree, and then get out of it and look for excuses. Say " yes " only when you are truly sure of your choice. If you promise something, then do more than you promised. Of course, you shouldn't overdo it either, but try to exceed your promises a little, and people will appreciate you even more. In a relationship, don't try to be the main one or the dependent one. Imposing your own opinion, trying to control others — all this is just annoying.

Do not try to elevate yourself by belittling or suppressing the merits of others, but reward those who deserve it in word or deed. Being a confident person, be able to laugh at yourself and admit your mistakes and shortcomings. You know that's not why people love you. Always be open to new knowledge. Don't flaunt your intelligence and erudition by trying to attract attention.

Admit that you are not perfect, and you can learn something from anyone. In communication, do not be selfish. Instead of talking about your loved one, listen to others around you. Do not teach people to live in their own way, your opinion is not the only correct one. Remember-less "I", more often "you" ("you").

Give the right gifts. Do not try to give the person something that you think will be useful, but rather ask them what they really need. And, of course, do not give a "dummy" that a person will accept with a smile, and after you leave, they will throw it on the mezzanine and forget it. Live on the move and strive for the best. If you have achieved a result in something, do not relax and do not calm down, but continue to act. The saying "A bird in the hand is better than a crane in the sky" is incorrect! Avoid risks and stressful situations.

Eliminate from your life everything that bothers and distracts you. In order to be able to collect your thoughts and tune in to the right mood, find yourself a place where no one will bother you. Live in the present. There is nothing in the world more valuable than the current moment. The past cannot be returned, the future is not predetermined, you only have what you have now. Don't try to fight people or situations that you can't control. It is better to make efforts in some other direction.

Develop yourself. Look for any opportunities for self-development. Read, communicate, take courses, and learn from others. Take for granted the fact that you can't be liked by everyone without exception. There are a lot of people, and everyone has their own problems, so appreciate those who like you, and just do not pay attention to others. In order to be charming and be liked by people, you do not need expensive beautiful outfits, fashionable hairstyles and a loose tongue.

Remember — first of all, you must love yourself.

 

[Tomcat]

Conflict and psychological defense​

In a conflict, each person chooses his own way of protection. In this article, you can get acquainted with the most common ones.

There are many internal conflicts in the life of every person. These conflicts are conventionally divided into three types.

The first type can be attributed to the actual motivational conflict, that is, the conflict of desires, aspirations, feelings, motives, which are opposite to each other.

This type of conflict has three types:

1. Rapprochement - rapprochement, the essence of this variety is the choice between two desirable options, for example, buy an expensive thing or go on a trip.

2. Avoidance - avoidance, the essence of this type is a choice between two undesirable opportunities, for example, move with an organization to another city or find another job.

3. Convergence - avoidance, the essence of this variety is that achieving a desired goal has undesirable consequences (for example, eating sweets and baked goods leads to excess weight) or the desired goal has both positive and negative consequences (a well-paid job and a bad schedule work).

The above examples refer to the simplest and well-recognized conflicts, but most of the conflicts are more complex and not always realized. The more significant the motive affected by the conflict, the worse it is realized.

One of the most dramatic internal conflicts is the conflicting feelings you have towards a significant person. For example, a young child's love for a mother comes into conflict with resentment towards her. In the mother, too, love for the child may conflict with dissatisfaction with him.

The next type of conflict is frustration, that is, the inability to get what you want or realize a motive; this type of conflict includes, among other things, the loss of a loved one, rejected feelings.

The third type of conflict affects a person's beliefs and values. This can manifest itself in a contradiction between desire and beliefs, or between a person's system of values and the surrounding reality.

The essence of psychological defenses lies in the protection of consciousness from negative experiences and manifests itself in the form of distortion.

Let's consider the most common types of protection.

Repression is the removal of unacceptable information, thoughts, desires from consciousness. A person does not perceive unacceptable feelings or undesirable information (does not see or hear it) or forgets.

Rationalization is an excuse for unseemly actions and desires (being late, broken promise, betrayal, etc.). Justifying arguments relate to the acts being justified, but are not the cause.

Projection is attributing qualities, thoughts, and desires that are unacceptable to others. The projection can be rationalistic (awareness of unacceptable qualities in oneself and ascribing them to others by generalizing "everyone does this") and complimentary (interpretation of one's unacceptable qualities as merits: quarrelsomeness, as a struggle for justice). Very often jealousy, envy, perception of others as unfair and selfish are exposed to projection.

Devaluation - raising oneself above others by reducing the significance of the actions, thoughts, feelings, desires and results of the activities of others and exaggerating the significance of their actions, thoughts, feelings, desires and results of activity.

Somatization is the transfer of mental conflict to the level of the body. This protection will manifest itself through disease. For example, a child wants to stay at home instead of going to kindergarten / school, and as a result he becomes ill. If the conflict is not resolved for a long time, then it can lead to chronic illness.

Psychological defenses contribute to the wrong perception of yourself and the world around you. On the one hand, they help protect our psyche from destruction, on the other hand, they create the basis for various diseases.

Working with a specialist helps to identify internal conflicts, promoting awareness of their motives, thereby allowing a person to stay healthy and improve the quality of his life.

 

[Tomcat]

Take a hit: psychological defense methods​

If you are bitten by one or even more bees, it can be beneficial to your health. But if you are attacked by a swarm of wasps or you find yourself the victim of a poisonous snake bite, then you really need it. Your competitors, ill-wishers or enemies are capable of inflicting no less harm on you, just using words that hurt your soul as a psychological weapon.

And the longer you worry about this, the more likely you are to be in the ranks of the losers.

“If a person shows that he is irritated and unable to control his emotions, he needs to do something else, and not work with people,” - confidently declared the Frenchman Michel Fadoul, who has achieved brilliant success in business at the world level.

Psychological security is a property of a mature personality. It consists of a whole complex of characteristics such as the level of intelligence, worldview attitudes, attentiveness, a tendency to analysis and reflection, critical thinking, emotional stability.

Ask yourself and others more often magic questions: what, where, when, how, why and why? Try to imagine the whole panorama and dynamics of the event, see the whole picture as a whole and note contradictions, inconsistencies and white spots, carefully treat the details. They are the necessary material for assessing the reliability of information.

We offer you several psychological defense techniques developed by us and tested in our trainings.

Reception "Fan". Analyze what you are reacting to most painfully. What annoys you? What makes you mad or discouraged? Remember the specific words, intonations, gestures of your opponents or offenders.
Close your eyes and again remember all the most offensive, biting, scorching words that cause you feelings of confusion and worthlessness or powerful outbursts of aggression.

Now imagine that you are sitting opposite the person who inflicts these psychological blows on you. It is he who speaks to you cruel, hurtful words. And you feel like you are already starting to get turned on. Induce the sensation of being hit. Which part of your body reacts to it? What happens: does heat appear throughout the body, or is something shrinking inside, or is it just that breathing is interrupted? What exactly is happening to you?
Use the emotion ventilation technique. Imagine that there is a powerful fan between you and the offender, which immediately blows his words aside, their sharp arrows do not reach you.

And further. Make a fig with your right hand and cover it with the palm of your left hand. Mentally direct it to the person who is trying to throw you out of balance. Remember how the same fig helped you, as a child, to "take revenge" on the offender.
Open your eyes and you will surely feel that you are now able to withstand such a psychological blow.

Reception "Aquarium". If, when dealing with people who are negative towards you, you continue to react painfully to their attacks, use this technique. Imagine that there is a thick glass wall of an aquarium between you and your abuser. He tells you something unpleasant, but you only see him, but you don't hear the words, they are absorbed by water and only bubble up with foam on the surface. Therefore, they do not work on you. And you, without losing your composure and peace of mind, do not succumb to provocation, do not react to offensive words. And thanks to this, you turn the tide in your favor.

Welcome to Disneyland. The morbidity of the psychological blow can be mitigated, if not completely reduced to naught, if you treat all people like small children. You are not offended by unintelligent children, are you?

Imagine that you are alone against a whole group of people negatively disposed towards you. The preponderance of forces is on their side. And you only have one chance to turn the tide: Introduce them as a group of kids on the playground. They get angry, naughty, screaming, waving their arms, throwing toys on the floor, trampling them with their feet. In general, they are trying in every possible way to piss you off. But you, as an adult, wise person, treat their antics as childish pranks and continue to remain calm until they are exhausted. You do not perceive their words as insults, do not react to their attacks. It's all funny for you to watch as an adult ...

Reception "Fox and Grapes". If in your past there were cases when someone managed to annoy you so that the experience of defeat remains until now, use the technique of rationalization, removing negative "anchors". Remember the fable "The Fox and the Grapes": before reaching the bunch of grapes, the fox said that she didn't really want grapes - it's sour and green.

Reception "Ocean of Calm". Imagine yourself as the protagonist of the parable: "The ocean receives the waters of many turbulent rivers, and at the same time remains motionless. The one into whom all thoughts and emotions also fall, remains impassive at rest."

Reception "Theater of the Absurd". You can use such a method of psychological protection as bringing the situation to the point of absurdity. This is basically the same as making an elephant out of a fly. That is, out loud to exaggerate beyond recognition what someone is only hinting at, and thus unexpectedly knock psychological weapons out of the hands of their enemies or ill-wishers. Your goal is to make sure that any attacks of the ill-wisher will no longer cause anything but laughter. This is the solution to the problem of how to protect yourself from a psychological attack.

Reception "Puppet Theater". If you find it difficult to communicate with people emotionally important to you, use this technique. Imagine that they are just caricatured characters of the TV show "Dolls". And let them say nonsense, communicating with each other. And you just observe it from the outside and make your own assessments. They say that this smart guy is posing as a superman, while the other is playing a strong personality, a professional, and he himself is a weakling, just bluffing. Play this play until you laugh. Your laugh is an indicator that the technique has worked.

 

[CarderPlanet]

Take a hit. Methods of psychological defense​

And the longer you worry about it, the more likely you are to be in the ranks of the losers.

“If a person shows that he is irritated and unable to control his emotions, he needs to do something else, and not work with people,” - confidently declared the Frenchman Michel Fadoul, who has achieved brilliant success in business at the world level.

Psychological security is a property of a mature personality. It consists of a whole complex of characteristics such as the level of intelligence, worldview attitudes, attentiveness, a tendency to analysis and reflection, critical thinking, emotional stability.

Ask yourself and others more often magic questions: what, where, when, how, why and why? Try to imagine the whole panorama and dynamics of the event, see the whole picture as a whole and note the contradictions, inconsistencies and white spots, carefully treat the details. They are the necessary material for assessing the reliability of information.

We offer you several psychological defense techniques developed by us and tested in our trainings.
Reception "Fan". Analyze what you are reacting to most painfully. What annoys you? What infuriates or discourages you? Remember the specific words, intonations, gestures of your opponents or offenders.

Close your eyes and again remember all the most offensive, biting, scorching words that cause you feelings of confusion and worthlessness or powerful outbursts of aggression.

Now imagine that you are sitting opposite the person who inflicts these psychological blows on you. It is he who speaks to you cruel, hurtful words. And you feel like you are already starting to get turned on. Induce the sensation of being hit. Which part of your body reacts to it? What happens: does heat appear throughout the body, or is something shrinking inside, or maybe the breath is just interrupted? What exactly is happening to you?
Use the emotion ventilation technique. Imagine that there is a powerful fan between you and the offender, which immediately blows his words aside, their sharp arrows do not reach you.

And further. Make a fig with your right hand and cover it with the palm of your left hand. Mentally direct it to the person who is trying to unsettle you. Remember how the same fig helped you "take revenge" on the offender as a child.

Open your eyes and you will surely feel that you are now able to withstand such a psychological blow.

Reception "Aquarium" . If, when dealing with people who are negative towards you, you continue to react painfully to their attacks, use this technique. Imagine that there is a thick glass wall of an aquarium between you and your abuser. He tells you something unpleasant, but you only see him, but you don't hear the words, they are absorbed by water and only bubble up with foam on the surface. Therefore, they do not work on you. And you, without losing your composure and peace of mind, do not succumb to provocation, do not react to offensive words. And thanks to this, you turn the tide in your favor.

Welcome to Disneyland. The morbidity of the psychological blow can be mitigated, if not completely reduced to naught, if you treat all people like small children. You are not offended by unintelligent children, are you?

Imagine that you are alone against a whole group of people negatively disposed towards you. The preponderance of forces is on their side. And you only have one chance to turn the tide: Introduce them as a group of kids on the playground. They get angry, naughty, screaming, waving their arms, throwing toys on the floor, trampling them with their feet. In general, they are trying in every possible way to piss you off. But you, as an adult, a wise person, treat their antics as childish pranks and continue to remain calm until they are exhausted. You do not perceive their words as insults, do not react to their attacks. It's all funny for you to watch as an adult ...
Reception "Fox and Grapes". If in your past there were cases when someone managed to annoy you so that the experience of defeat remains until now, use the technique of rationalization, removing negative "anchors". Remember the fable "The Fox and the Grapes": before reaching the bunch of grapes, the fox said that she didn't really want grapes - it's sour and green.

Reception "Ocean of Calm". Imagine yourself as the protagonist of the parable: "The ocean receives the waters of many turbulent rivers, and at the same time remains motionless. The one into whom all thoughts and emotions also fall, remains impassive at rest."

Reception "Theater of the Absurd". You can use such a method of psychological protection as bringing the situation to the point of absurdity. This is basically the same as making an elephant out of a fly. That is, out loud to exaggerate beyond recognition what someone is only hinting at, and thus unexpectedly knock psychological weapons out of the hands of their enemies or ill-wishers. Your goal is to make sure that any attacks of the ill-wisher will no longer cause anything but laughter. This is the solution to the problem of how to protect yourself from a psychological attack.

Reception "Puppet Theater". If you find it difficult to communicate with people who are emotionally important to you, use this technique. Imagine that they are just caricatured characters of the TV show "Dolls". And let them say nonsense, communicating with each other. And you just observe it from the outside and make your own assessments. They say that this smart guy is posing as a superman, while the other is playing a strong personality, a professional, and he himself is a weakling, just bluffing. Play this play until you laugh. Your laugh is an indicator that the technique has worked.