Lord777
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A bad habit can ruin your life. You perfectly understand this and really want to get rid of it, but ... nothing comes of it. Want to know why?
And because your brain knows many clever ways to keep you at the mercy of your habits.
1. Your brain thinks you are "the future" of a completely different person
You know that tomorrow, at exactly 8:00 am, you will have to take an important exam. And, nevertheless, it is already one in the morning, and you are still in aimless wanderings through the back streets of the Internet. Mind you, of course, understand that it is high time to go to bed and that tomorrow your night vigil will come out sideways, but on a subconscious level, "tomorrow's version" of yourself seems to you a completely different person. The one tomorrow will deal with the consequences; and today's will watch some more action movie.
One scientific study found that when we think about ourselves and about other people, completely different parts of our gray matter are activated. This is quite understandable - the brain assigns different shares to its beloved and to everyone else, because, first of all, it thinks about its own needs. The strange thing is that for some people, when thinking about themselves in the future, those areas that were reserved for "outsiders" were activated.
So how do you now motivate yourself to give up the bun and go to the gym? You can convince yourself as much as you like that soon not a single pair of pants will be buttoned on you, but since your brain refuses to associate itself with tomorrow's fat man, it will manipulate your subconscious mind to once again enjoy fragrant pastries.
2. It takes about ten weeks to form a stable "good" habit.
Let's say you have one or two bad habits that you definitely need to get rid of. You decide to start by acquiring a few good ones, because, as you know, the surest way to overcome an addiction is to supplant it with another addiction. You buy a membership to a local gym, and plan to train three times a week and finally defeat the passion for cakes. Or beer. Or something else.
How long do you think you will have to force yourself until training becomes an integral part of your life? And how soon will exercise start to be enjoyable?
According to one study, it takes about 66 days to form a habit. During this time, conscious effort and compulsion become automatic. So if you decide to make friends with the treadmill, keep in mind that only after two months it will turn from torture into a routine.
During these two months, all sorts of obstacles and slingshots will constantly stand in your way. Then you catch a cold, then you have to stay late at work ... And that's all. The end of a good habit and a return to the old "harmful" joys - because the latter have long been formed and built into your life.
This does not happen because your brain wishes you harm - it just loves performance, and bad habits are always effective. And the result he achieves is this: turn your life into a set of repetitive actions that can be done on autopilot, develop, based on the experience, a set of rules that would allow you to live life, spending a minimum of energy. Everything.
Therefore, if you want to disrupt the usual course of your life, you will have to be very difficult. About two months.
3. Willpower is a limited resource
If you nevertheless firmly decided, for example, to run every morning, and are tuned in to a long struggle with yourself, we consider it our duty to warn you: the greatest danger on your path to perfection is not all sorts of circumstances beyond your control, but ... lack of motivation. That is, if, say, you run every morning and can already boast of certain successes, then at some point you may decide that you deserve a break.
It turns out that the more often and longer people resist their desires, the less willpower they have left to resist the subsequent desire. In psychology, this phenomenon is called "depletion of willpower."
During the experiment, the scientists asked one group of students to memorize a two-digit number and another seven-digit number. Then the participants from both groups were offered a choice between cake and fruit salad. Amazingly, students who memorized the seven-digit number chose cakes twice as often. That is, in order to significantly reduce willpower and throw away the white flag, it is enough to remember some five extra numbers.
Then the scientists conducted another experiment, in which they approached the same problem from the other side: the volunteers were shown two dishes - one with freshly made cookies, and the other with radishes. Half of the participants were pre-instructed to take a cookie, the other half to take a radish. After that, everyone was asked to solve a complex geometric puzzle. Those who took the radish abandoned the task after eight minutes, and those who got the cookies fought on the puzzle for a full 19 minutes.
Despite the fact that the task did not require any physical effort, the refusal of the delicious cookies took away from the participants some of the energy that could be spent on the task.
4. The brain uses your successes as an excuse to indulge itself.
For one recent study, scientists assembled a group of dieters who had already made notable gains. The volunteers were divided into two groups. Some were praised for their successes on the way to achieving their ideal, others were not told anything special.
Both groups were then offered the choice between an apple and a chocolate bar as a thank you gift for participating in the study. 85 percent of those who were praised chose chocolate, while in the second group, only 58 percent of the participants preferred chocolate.
Those to whom they sang praises decided that they had every right to reward themselves once for their successes, while others humbly chewed apples.
In other words, recognizing success is the first step to failure.
If the "celebration" was limited to just one chocolate bar, this would not be a big problem. But ... ask any person who has climbed out of any addiction, and he will confirm that "once" almost always turns into a whole stream of small defeats, and before you have time to look back, not a trace remains of your successes ...
As we already said, the brain prefers the old, familiar, and therefore less energy-consuming way of existence, even if you risk not living up to forty with it.
But sometimes ...
5. You put up with a bad habit to save yourself from a big failure.
There is a special type of people who are always whining. Some insurmountable obstacle always stands in their way to success - neither one, so another. Having talked with such a person for a long enough time, you understand that he does not strive to achieve anything, he just constantly invents new and new obstacles for himself - and, apparently, on purpose.
Psychologists call this phenomenon "masochistic personality disorder." Scientists explain this behavior as follows: a person subconsciously "agrees" to failure, which he can relatively easily survive, because he is afraid of another, some very painful one. That is, it makes a kind of deal.
For example, a lonely guy would rather give up on girls altogether and endure ridicule than allow some beauty to dismiss him as a nerd / mattress / pimply bore.
And then it is very easy to understand how another bad habit grows out of this. Let's say your office work is complicated by the fact that you hate wearing ties or getting up in the morning. In this case, you have a very strong motivation to cherish and cherish these weaknesses in yourself, because they protect you from the shame of being incompetent and failing in your professional activity. Therefore, you continue to stagger around, but with the illusion of your own professional genius, which always prevents you from showing something. A bad habit guards your self-esteem.
And because your brain knows many clever ways to keep you at the mercy of your habits.
1. Your brain thinks you are "the future" of a completely different person
You know that tomorrow, at exactly 8:00 am, you will have to take an important exam. And, nevertheless, it is already one in the morning, and you are still in aimless wanderings through the back streets of the Internet. Mind you, of course, understand that it is high time to go to bed and that tomorrow your night vigil will come out sideways, but on a subconscious level, "tomorrow's version" of yourself seems to you a completely different person. The one tomorrow will deal with the consequences; and today's will watch some more action movie.
One scientific study found that when we think about ourselves and about other people, completely different parts of our gray matter are activated. This is quite understandable - the brain assigns different shares to its beloved and to everyone else, because, first of all, it thinks about its own needs. The strange thing is that for some people, when thinking about themselves in the future, those areas that were reserved for "outsiders" were activated.
So how do you now motivate yourself to give up the bun and go to the gym? You can convince yourself as much as you like that soon not a single pair of pants will be buttoned on you, but since your brain refuses to associate itself with tomorrow's fat man, it will manipulate your subconscious mind to once again enjoy fragrant pastries.
2. It takes about ten weeks to form a stable "good" habit.
Let's say you have one or two bad habits that you definitely need to get rid of. You decide to start by acquiring a few good ones, because, as you know, the surest way to overcome an addiction is to supplant it with another addiction. You buy a membership to a local gym, and plan to train three times a week and finally defeat the passion for cakes. Or beer. Or something else.
How long do you think you will have to force yourself until training becomes an integral part of your life? And how soon will exercise start to be enjoyable?
According to one study, it takes about 66 days to form a habit. During this time, conscious effort and compulsion become automatic. So if you decide to make friends with the treadmill, keep in mind that only after two months it will turn from torture into a routine.
During these two months, all sorts of obstacles and slingshots will constantly stand in your way. Then you catch a cold, then you have to stay late at work ... And that's all. The end of a good habit and a return to the old "harmful" joys - because the latter have long been formed and built into your life.
This does not happen because your brain wishes you harm - it just loves performance, and bad habits are always effective. And the result he achieves is this: turn your life into a set of repetitive actions that can be done on autopilot, develop, based on the experience, a set of rules that would allow you to live life, spending a minimum of energy. Everything.
Therefore, if you want to disrupt the usual course of your life, you will have to be very difficult. About two months.
3. Willpower is a limited resource
If you nevertheless firmly decided, for example, to run every morning, and are tuned in to a long struggle with yourself, we consider it our duty to warn you: the greatest danger on your path to perfection is not all sorts of circumstances beyond your control, but ... lack of motivation. That is, if, say, you run every morning and can already boast of certain successes, then at some point you may decide that you deserve a break.
It turns out that the more often and longer people resist their desires, the less willpower they have left to resist the subsequent desire. In psychology, this phenomenon is called "depletion of willpower."
During the experiment, the scientists asked one group of students to memorize a two-digit number and another seven-digit number. Then the participants from both groups were offered a choice between cake and fruit salad. Amazingly, students who memorized the seven-digit number chose cakes twice as often. That is, in order to significantly reduce willpower and throw away the white flag, it is enough to remember some five extra numbers.
Then the scientists conducted another experiment, in which they approached the same problem from the other side: the volunteers were shown two dishes - one with freshly made cookies, and the other with radishes. Half of the participants were pre-instructed to take a cookie, the other half to take a radish. After that, everyone was asked to solve a complex geometric puzzle. Those who took the radish abandoned the task after eight minutes, and those who got the cookies fought on the puzzle for a full 19 minutes.
Despite the fact that the task did not require any physical effort, the refusal of the delicious cookies took away from the participants some of the energy that could be spent on the task.
4. The brain uses your successes as an excuse to indulge itself.
For one recent study, scientists assembled a group of dieters who had already made notable gains. The volunteers were divided into two groups. Some were praised for their successes on the way to achieving their ideal, others were not told anything special.
Both groups were then offered the choice between an apple and a chocolate bar as a thank you gift for participating in the study. 85 percent of those who were praised chose chocolate, while in the second group, only 58 percent of the participants preferred chocolate.
Those to whom they sang praises decided that they had every right to reward themselves once for their successes, while others humbly chewed apples.
In other words, recognizing success is the first step to failure.
If the "celebration" was limited to just one chocolate bar, this would not be a big problem. But ... ask any person who has climbed out of any addiction, and he will confirm that "once" almost always turns into a whole stream of small defeats, and before you have time to look back, not a trace remains of your successes ...
As we already said, the brain prefers the old, familiar, and therefore less energy-consuming way of existence, even if you risk not living up to forty with it.
But sometimes ...
5. You put up with a bad habit to save yourself from a big failure.
There is a special type of people who are always whining. Some insurmountable obstacle always stands in their way to success - neither one, so another. Having talked with such a person for a long enough time, you understand that he does not strive to achieve anything, he just constantly invents new and new obstacles for himself - and, apparently, on purpose.
Psychologists call this phenomenon "masochistic personality disorder." Scientists explain this behavior as follows: a person subconsciously "agrees" to failure, which he can relatively easily survive, because he is afraid of another, some very painful one. That is, it makes a kind of deal.
For example, a lonely guy would rather give up on girls altogether and endure ridicule than allow some beauty to dismiss him as a nerd / mattress / pimply bore.
And then it is very easy to understand how another bad habit grows out of this. Let's say your office work is complicated by the fact that you hate wearing ties or getting up in the morning. In this case, you have a very strong motivation to cherish and cherish these weaknesses in yourself, because they protect you from the shame of being incompetent and failing in your professional activity. Therefore, you continue to stagger around, but with the illusion of your own professional genius, which always prevents you from showing something. A bad habit guards your self-esteem.